Leaves Jokes

Is your name Rapunzel, cause I need a girl who never leaves the bedroom and constantly wants me to pull her hair?
I used to make loads of money clearing leaves from lawns. I was raking it in.
Ireland always leaves me wanting Moher.
I would hate to see you go, but I love watching your leaves.
Why does it take a while before a peach leaves a fruit basket? They have to give a goodbye peach first.
“No man goes before his time—unless the boss leaves early.” — Groucho Marx
"No man goes before his time - unless the boss leaves early"
Dew is formed on leaves when the sun shines down on them and makes them perspire.
Mushrooms always grow in damp places and so they look like umbrellas.
The pistol of a flower is its only protection against insects.
Germinate: To become a naturalized German.
Rhubarb: A kind of celery gone bloodshot.
I used to make lots of money clearing leaves from gardens. I was raking it in.
You’re so beautiful even the leaves fall for you.
What do the lady pigs say when someone leaves the toilet seat up? “Hoof-orgot to put the seat down?"
Ran out of toilet paper today. We’re now using lettuce leaves.
Today was just the tip of the iceberg. Tomorrow romaines to be seen.
Why is it so hard to contact a pirate? He leaves his phone off the hooks.
“Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected.” – Red Buttons
“I’m totally ‘that dad’ who leaves a note in my son’s lunch box. One day I’ll actually start putting food in there also.”

- Steve Ryan.