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Heavy Jokes

Bone Puns
How heavy are your bones?
They are scale-a-ton.
Avocado Puns
What did the Mexican heavy metal guitarist say to his bandmates?
“Rock out with your guac out.”
Cake Puns
What do you call a cake that likes heavy metal?
Megadeath by Chocolate.
Rainbow Puns
How heavy is a rainbow? It's actually pretty light.
Poop Puns
After letting elephant dung dry in the sun, it's nearly indestructible.
In fact, I'd say it's pretty heavy doody.
Monster Puns
Why did the skeleton put on a heavy coat?
He was chillled to the bone.
Sorry Pick Up Lines
Excuse me madan, could you help me? My hands ar so heavy. Could you hold them for me?
Bed Puns
My wife ordered one of those new heavy blankets but delivery took forever...
She says it was worth the weight.
I'm thinking about buying a weighted blanket.
This is a most heavy decision.
Medieval Puns
Dance music can be traced back to medieval times when a farmer dropped some heavy beets.
One Liners and Short Jokes
What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?
One’s really heavy, the other’s a little lighter.
Werewolf Puns
Werewolf Weather Furcast: Tomorrow we expect heavy showers.
Band Puns
Which heavy metal band is Santa's favourite?
Sleigh-er.
Color Puns
I was surprised that although I was supposed to be feeling blue, my heart was not that heavy. Perhaps, I am feeling light blue.
Irish Puns
Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick's Day?
Real rocks are too heavy.