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Heavy Jokes

Avocado Puns
What did the Mexican heavy metal guitarist say to his bandmates?
“Rock out with your guac out.”
Medieval Puns
Dance music can be traced back to medieval times when a farmer dropped some heavy beets.
Bed Puns
My wife ordered one of those new heavy blankets but delivery took forever...
She says it was worth the weight.
I'm thinking about buying a weighted blanket.
This is a most heavy decision.
One Liners and Short Jokes
What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?
One’s really heavy, the other’s a little lighter.
Monster Puns
Why did the skeleton put on a heavy coat?
He was chillled to the bone.
Rainbow Puns
How heavy is a rainbow? It's actually pretty light.
Bone Puns
How heavy are your bones?
They are scale-a-ton.
Sorry Pick Up Lines
Excuse me madan, could you help me? My hands ar so heavy. Could you hold them for me?
Color Puns
I was surprised that although I was supposed to be feeling blue, my heart was not that heavy. Perhaps, I am feeling light blue.
Band Puns
Which heavy metal band is Santa's favourite?
Sleigh-er.
Werewolf Puns
Werewolf Weather Furcast: Tomorrow we expect heavy showers.
Cake Puns
What do you call a cake that likes heavy metal?
Megadeath by Chocolate.
Irish Puns
Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick's Day?
Real rocks are too heavy.
Poop Puns
After letting elephant dung dry in the sun, it's nearly indestructible.
In fact, I'd say it's pretty heavy doody.