Heavy Jokes

How heavy is a rainbow? It's actually pretty light.
Why did the skeleton put on a heavy coat?
He was chillled to the bone.
What did the Mexican heavy metal guitarist say to his bandmates?
“Rock out with your guac out.”
Werewolf Weather Furcast: Tomorrow we expect heavy showers.
After letting elephant dung dry in the sun, it's nearly indestructible.
In fact, I'd say it's pretty heavy doody.
Dance music can be traced back to medieval times when a farmer dropped some heavy beets.
Which heavy metal band is Santa's favourite?
Sleigh-er.
I was surprised that although I was supposed to be feeling blue, my heart was not that heavy. Perhaps, I am feeling light blue.
How heavy are your bones?
They are scale-a-ton.
Why do people wear shamrocks on St. Patrick's Day?
Real rocks are too heavy.
My wife ordered one of those new heavy blankets but delivery took forever...
She says it was worth the weight.
I'm thinking about buying a weighted blanket.
This is a most heavy decision.
Excuse me madan, could you help me? My hands ar so heavy. Could you hold them for me?
What’s the difference between a hippo and a Zippo?
One’s really heavy, the other’s a little lighter.
What do you call a cake that likes heavy metal?
Megadeath by Chocolate.