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During Jokes

Nuts Puns
The nut stayed c-almond and collected during the earthquake.
Yard Puns
During the divorce, the judge couldn't decide who got the shack in the backyard, despite our numerous arguments.
It was a case of he shed, she shed.
My HOA agreement has a statement mandating we have an inflatable Santa displayed in our yard during December.
There is a Santa clause.
Orange Puns
During World War 2, sending food to the troops was a challenge. Researchers had to concentrate to figure out how to send orange juice.
Peach Puns
What’s the best time to eat a peach while watching a NASCAR race? During the pit stop!
During the summer break, I enrolled myself in a peach coding course.
Funny Work Quotes
"His insomnia was so bad, he couldn’t sleep during office hours."
~ Arthur Baer
Christian Pick Up Lines
My love for you is like a fruitcake during the holidays - nutty, spicy and unavoidable, no matter how hard you try.
Mushroom Puns
During the contribution’s session, the mushroom family never gave a lot. They were just two spore.
Garden Puns
Has anyone else's gardening skills improved during this quarantine like mine have?
I planted myself on the sofa at the beginning of April and I've grown bigger ever since.
Onion Puns
In the history class, the onion teachers taught the student onions that during the vegetable cold war, the Soviet Onion was a superpower.
During the battle between the two onion kings, one of them was on the back foot as it was leek-ing blood.
Pea Puns
"I'll be right back, I need to go for a pea," said the fruit during the interval.
Witch Puns
Why did the witch stay in a hotel during her travels?
She heard they had great broom service.
Cherry Puns
What do red berries say during the season they love best? Cherry Christmas and a Happy New Year!