Ago Jokes

Dad: Years ago I had the opportunity to meet R.E.M., and we even took a picture together with my buddies.
Son: Where are you in the photo?
Dad: That's me in the corner.
My friend went bald years ago, but still carries his old comb with him.
He just can’t part with it.
2000 years ago, pop diva Lady Cleopatra had a smash hit: "Bad Romans."
Are you an alien because you abducted my heart long ago.
A spider crawled under my keyboard a few minutes ago.
Good news: I’ve got it under Ctrl.
Many years ago, my grandfather used to cut the grass- but, he's been gone for a lawn time.
My pink bird friend got dumped a while ago. He was sad for a while, but now he’s singe and ready to flamingle.
What did you call the cat next door 10,000 years ago?
A neighbor-toothed tiger.
Thankfully evolution gave us ears a million years ago...
Now we finally get to use them to wear masks.
5 years ago today I asked my childhood sweetheart, my best friend, and the most beautiful woman in the world to marry me.
All three said No!
Are you a fidget spinner? Because the last time I had fun with you was forever ago and I’m not really interested in touching you anymore. I’m pretty sure you were just a phase and now I’d really like to get you out of my house and forget it ever happened.
Long ago, a couple of dudes claimed that human flight was possible.
They were Wright.
A century ago, two brothers insisted that it was possible to fly ...
And as you can see, they were Wright.
A few years ago, I had a job translating pre-Classical Greek literature into Braille.
It feels like ancient history.
Two days ago, I named my Wifi to "Hack it if you can".

Yesterday it was changed to "Challenge accepted".