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Ago Jokes

Dad Puns
Dad: Years ago I had the opportunity to meet R.E.M., and we even took a picture together with my buddies.
Son: Where are you in the photo?
Dad: That's me in the corner.
Hair Puns
My friend went bald years ago, but still carries his old comb with him.
He just can’t part with it.
Ancient Rome Puns
2000 years ago, pop diva Lady Cleopatra had a smash hit: "Bad Romans."
Space Pick Up Lines
Are you an alien because you abducted my heart long ago.
Spider Puns
A spider crawled under my keyboard a few minutes ago.
Good news: I’ve got it under Ctrl.
Grass Puns
Many years ago, my grandfather used to cut the grass- but, he's been gone for a lawn time.
Flamingo Puns
My pink bird friend got dumped a while ago. He was sad for a while, but now he’s singe and ready to flamingle.
Tiger Puns
What did you call the cat next door 10,000 years ago?
A neighbor-toothed tiger.
Ear Puns
Thankfully evolution gave us ears a million years ago...
Now we finally get to use them to wear masks.
Marriage Puns
5 years ago today I asked my childhood sweetheart, my best friend, and the most beautiful woman in the world to marry me.
All three said No!
Funny Break Up Lines
Are you a fidget spinner? Because the last time I had fun with you was forever ago and I’m not really interested in touching you anymore. I’m pretty sure you were just a phase and now I’d really like to get you out of my house and forget it ever happened.
Flight Puns
Long ago, a couple of dudes claimed that human flight was possible.
They were Wright.
Sibling Puns
A century ago, two brothers insisted that it was possible to fly ...
And as you can see, they were Wright.
Greece Puns
A few years ago, I had a job translating pre-Classical Greek literature into Braille.
It feels like ancient history.
Wifi Puns
Two days ago, I named my Wifi to "Hack it if you can".

Yesterday it was changed to "Challenge accepted".