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orang pinoy adalah Jokes

orang pinoy adalah Jokes and more.
The Best Sleeping Pills
An elderly woman went into the pharmacy. When the pharmacist asked why she was there, she replied, “I’d like to have some birth control pills.” Taken aback, the pharmacist thought for a minute and then said, “Excuse me, Mrs. Smith, but you’re 75 years old. What possible use could you have for birth control pills?” The woman responded, “They help me sleep better.” The pharmacist thought some more and continued, “How in the world do birth control pills help you to sleep?” The woman said, “I put them in my granddaughter’s orange juice and I sleep better at night.”
One Liners and Short Jokes
Teacher: "If I had seven oranges in one hand and eight oranges in the other, what would I have?"

Little Johnny: "Big hands!"
Lemon Puns
What did the orange say to the lemon?
"'yello!"
Did you hear that the Lemon and the Orange divorced?
The Lemon was very bitter.
Knock Knock Jokes
Knock Knock!
Who’s there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you going to answer the door?
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Banana.
Banana who?
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Orange.
Orange who?
ORANGE YOU GLAD I DIDN’T SAY BANANA!
Orange Puns
What’s an orange’s favourite animal? An orange-utan.
Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Orange.
Orange who?
Orange you going to open the door.
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad to see me?
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you going to let me in?.
Why did the orange turn into orange juice?
It couldn’t handle the pressure.
Where were the first orange trees planted?
“In Orange County.”
Why did the orange come back after it was thrown in the garbage?
It was a boom-orange.
What's the difference between French fries and orange juice?
You can make orange juice out of orange, but not French fries out of French
Why was red in awe of orange?
“Because orange blue green.”
What rhymes with orange?
No, it doesn’t.
What do you get when an Elephant sits on an Orange?
Orange squash.
What can a whole orange do that half an orange can never do?
“Look round!”
Why did the orange’s musical number receive a bad review?
Because it wasn’t an “orange-inal.”
He apologized for driving the orange to the edge of the blade
A lemon says to an orange, “What are you up to?”
The orange replies, “Not much. Just hanging ‘round.”
What is a vampire’s favorite fruit?
A blood orange.
Knock, knock! Who’s there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock Who’s there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock Who’s there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad I didn’t say banana?
What did mamma orange say to little orange after he spilled his milk? It’s no big peel!
The least favorite day for an orange is a juice day.
“My favorite color is tangerine- isn’t that orange-inal?”
Apples and oranges had a conversation one day. Guess what the apples were saying the oranges, nothing stupid, apples don’t talk.
Why did the orange go to the doctor?
“It wasn’t peeling well.”
Why do oranges wear suntan lotion? They peel in the sun.
What do you call a male orange?
Mangerine!
Why did the orange get insurance?
Zest in case.
What is the healthiest fruit?
“An orange. It takes Vitamin See!”
Finally, the call came in and the orange was informed by the person on the other end of the line that the company had orange-d an interview for the following day.
Q: Why can’t oranges be pirates?
A: They don’t get scurvy.
Why was the orange the valedictorian of her class?
She was the zest in class.
Which Star Wars character was the orange cast for?
Emperor Pulpatine.
Why was the orange feeling sad?
It lost its zest for life.
What do you call a punctual citrus fruit?
A Clockwork Orange.
What are the longest lasting relationships in the fruit world? Orange-d marriages.
Why was the girl staring at the carton of orange juice?
“It said concentrate.”
Why did the lemon like the orange? He’s not from concentrate.
Why did the orange cry?
Someone hurt its peelings.
Oranges rarely pass driving tests, this is because they keep on peeling out.
Why did the fruit bat eat the orange?
“Because it had appeal.”
Why did the blonde stare at the carton of orange juice? It said concentrate.
Q: Why are orange and banana phones so popular these days?
A: They have appeal.
When the orange started peeling, he was glad it was finally cutting some weight.
An Experiment Turned Race
There was a young fellow who was quite inventive and was always trying out new things. One day he thought he'd see just how fast a bicycle could go before it became uncontrollable. He asked his friend, who owned an old Chevelle if he could tie his bike to the bumper of his car to test his theory. His friend said, "Sure." So the young man tied his bike to the back of the car and said to his friend: "I'll ring my bike bell once if I want you to go faster, twice if I want you to maintain speed, and repeatedly if I want you to slow down." With that, off they went. Things were going pretty well, with the car driver slowly speeding up to well over 60 mph. The young fellow on the bike was handling the speed just fine. But, all of sudden, an orange Camaro came up beside them and before you knew it, the fellow driving the Chevelle forgot all about the fellow on the bike and took to drag racing the Chevelle. A little further down the road sat Officer John in his police cruiser, radar gun at the ready. He heard the two cars before his radar flashed 105 mph He called into headquarters on his radio: "Hey, you guys aren't going to believe this, but there's a Camaro and a Chevelle racing out here on Highway 3, and there's a guy on a bike ringing his bell and waving his arms trying to pass them!"
It's Not Easy Finding a Job...
At my first job I was working in an orange juice factory, but I got canned. I just couldn't concentrate. Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack, but I just couldn't hack it, so they gave me the axe. After that, I tried being a tailor, but I wasn't suited for it - mainly because it was a sew-sew job. Next, I tried working at Starbucks, but I had to quit because I got tired of the same old grind. Then, I tried being a chef - I figured it would add spice to my life, but I just didn't have the thyme. Next, I tried working in a deli, but any way I sliced it, I just couldn't cut the mustard. My best job was as a musician, but I eventually found I wasn't noteworthy. I studied for a long time to become a doctor, but I didn't have any patience. Next up was a job in a shoe factory - I tried hard, but I just didn't fit in. After that, I became a fisherman, but I discovered I couldn't live on my net income. Next, I managed to get a job at a pool maintenance company, but the work was too draining. So after that I got a job at a workout center, but they said I wasn't fit for the job. After many years of trying to find steady work, I finally got a job as a historian, but I realized there was no future in it. My last job was when I tried working in a muffler factory, but that was too exhausting. So, I tried retirement! And I Found I'm PERFECT For the Job!
Halloween Puns
Orange you excited for Halloween?
Gorilla Puns
Q. What is a gorilla's favorite toy?
A. A bab-boom-orang.
Fruit Puns
What is a vampire's favorite fruit?
A blood orange.
Why are oranges the smartest fruit?
Because they are made to concentrate.
Funny Limericks
There once was a colour named orange,

...Damnit.
Fish Puns
Why are goldfish orange?
The water makes them rusty.
Juice Puns
Why did the orange become juice?
It couldn't handle the pressure.
Grocery Store Pick Up Lines
I hate oranges. Will you be my main squeeze?
Lucky Number 5
I was walking down the street a few days ago I happened upon my good friend Tim. I waved him over and told him I had the craziest dream the other night. Tim listened as I told him that the dream consisted of just one thing. A huge, bright, number -5-. It was made of gold and shined like the sun. Tim's eyebrows went up with curiosity. I continued to tell him that the first thing I did that day was to look up the local horse racing track contenders. Tim raised an eyebrow. I told him that the number 5 contender in the 5th race was named "The Fifth Element." Tim started grinning. Then I told him of what I did to make sure I get my luck working in my favor. I ate 5 bowls of cereal for breakfast and drank 5 cups of orange juice I went for a 5 mile jog to feel good. I spent 5 minutes in the shower washing off. I dressed in the 5th shirt I found. I sat in my car for 5 minutes before beginning to drive, then I drove to the racetrack and parked in the 5th stall in the 5th row. I entered through the 5th admissions gate and bought 5 programs. I went to the 5th betting window and bet $555 on the 5th horse in the 5th race. I went and sat in the 5th row of the bleachers making sure there were 5 people sitting on both sides of me. I settled in and waited for the race to start. "Well," said Tim. "Did your horse win??!?" I frowned at Tim and said, "Stupid horse came in 5th."
Anti Jokes
What’s orange and tastes like an orange? An orange.
What is green, red, yellow, purple and orange?
Colors.
Diving Puns
What do you get for diving into a wave of oranges.
Vitamin Sea.
Parrot Puns
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot!
Dad's Crushing Comeback
I took my dad to the mall the other day to buy some new shoes (he’s 92). We decided to grab a bite at the food court. I noticed he was watching a teenager sitting nearby. The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors - green, red, orange, and blue. My dad kept staring at him. Every time the teen looked over, he’d catch my dad still staring. Eventually, the teenager had enough and sarcastically asked, “What’s the matter, old man? Never done anything wild in your life?” Knowing my dad, I quickly swallowed my food to avoid choking on his comeback. I knew he’d have a good one, and, of course, in classic fashion, he didn’t even blink when he replied: “Got drunk once and had a wild night with a parrot. Just wondering if you were my son.”
Color Puns
Q. Why are orange jokes so dumb?
A. Because oranges are afraid to concentrate.
Q. What did the bully do to the orange?
A. Beat him to a pulp.
The Mute German Boy
An American couple decided to adopt a little German boy. After two years, the child doesn’t speak and his parents start to worry about him. After three years, he still has not spoken and after four years, he has yet to utter a word. The American couple figure he is never going to speak but he is still a lovely child, and on his next birthday, they threw him a party and made him a chocolate cake with orange icing. The parents are in the kitchen when the boy comes in and says, “Mother, Father, I do not care for the orange icing on the chocolate cake.” My God,” says his mother. “You can speak?” To which the German boy replies, “Of course.” "How come you've never spoken before?“ asks his father. “Vell,” says the boy, “up until now, everything has been satisfactory.”