I was going to tell a joke about the natural disaster in the Indian Ocean
But it was too Tsunami.
Why is the ocean so salty?
Because the land never waves back.
Where do shellfish go to borrow money?
The prawn broker.
What did the ocean say when asked if he wanted to be friends with the beach?
“Shore!”
What did the ocean say to the beach?
Thanks for all the sediment.
Why don’t clams give to charity?
Because they’re shellfish!
Why Did the Whale Cross the Ocean?
To get to the other tide.
What do baleen whales call a hook-up?
Netflix and krill.
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on your doorstep? Matt. What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean?
Bob.
I had a dream the ocean was filled with orange soda
It was a Fanta sea.
What does a fish say when he makes a mistake?
It was just a fluke!
What does the fish say when she disagrees with her husband?
I don’t quite sea it that way.
What did the carp say to his crush?
Don’t play koi with me!
Did you hear about the sea captain who made a special salt-proof boat for the salty waters of the ocean?
It was a sailing solution to cross a saline solution
Why did the fisherman start doing drugs?
Pier pressure.
How are bad school grades like a shipwreck in the Arctic Ocean? They're both below C level!
I can't believe I can't see the bottom of the ocean.
It's unfathomable.
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
What do you call a big fish that makes you an offer you can’t refuse?
The Codfather.
What is the best way to communicate with a fish?
Drop it a line!
How do you split the ocean in half?
With a sea-saw.
What’s a cetacean’s favorite TV show?
Whale of Fortune.
What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
My friend asked me how big the ocean is.
I said "can you be more Pacific?"
Australia announced that they have begun dumping sewage into the ocean
It’s now classified as an in-continent.
Where does a killer whale go for braces?
The orca-dontist.
Where does seaweed look for a job?
In the kelp-wanted section.
My dad hates the ocean, but the other day he bought a boat.
He never could resist a good sail.
What drug is illegal in the ocean
Sea weed
How did the shark plead in the murder case?
Not gill-ty.
How do you cut an ocean in half?
With a seasaw!