From time to time, we all give advice to the people around us. As we get older, we have more and more advice to give based on our own experience. But the way we give advice can be quite different, based on our personalities and how we like to solve our own problems. Answer our questions honestly and we may find what kind of advisor you truly are.
When you think about giving advice, what is usually your goal?
To get to the solution they are asking me to find
To find out what caused the underlying problem
To find an original solution they would never think of
To give them the best solution possible
Your sibling comes to you and asks for your advice: He is bored at his steady, well paying job and wants to try something new. What will you say?
I would make sure it's a real desire and show him what's needed to find new work
I would try and find the source of his feelings about the job and maybe help fix them
I would look at the problem every which way, taking into account feasibility and his finances
I'd tell him to volunteer in his free time to make his life more fulfilling
Complete the sentence: People would describe me as ______.
What would you advise a woman who loves a cheating husband and their kids and life together?
I would tell her to continue their life but turn it into an open marriage
I would scrutinize her options. She may be right and it's not worth it leaving him
I would talk about how it makes her feel and how she thinks she can make her husband stop his behavior
I would tell her to kick him out to the curb and find someone better
If you were a therapist, which painting would you hang in your clinic?
Your child comes home bleeding and scratched after playing with rough boys. He doesn't want to tell them to go away but doesn't like how rough they are. What do you do?
I make discrete phone calls to their parents to keep their kids away from my child
I find the root of his issue and convince him to tell them he doesn't want to be their friend
I consider his social opportunities and how rough the play is and advise him accordingly
I tell him to pretend he has a really scary dad who works for the army then tell them to buzz off
Your friend is studying medicine but just had a baby a few months ago, she can either return to studying now or wait a year. She asks for your advice.
"Go now, you can always change your mind later."
"Why are you scared of going now? What's troubling you?"
"What makes more sense? Do you have enough resources to stay home for a year?
"Stay at home for a year and study up. Next year you'll be the best student!"
When people come to you for advice, it is usually...
Very quick, and so is my advice
Slow, as we get into all the details of the problem
Emotional and revealing for both of us
It changes from time to time
Your friend is nearing 40 and just can't find a man she wants to marry. What would you say?
"It's time to lower those standards!"
"Let's talk about why you keep rejecting men."
"Considering your resources and your looks and your age, I will draw a list of minimal criteria."
"Maybe try adopting a dog or cat instead?"
Have you ever considered working as a therapist or life coach?
I often thought I'd make a good therapist
I would totally make a great life coach
Probably not, it's a bit too heavy of a job for me to do all the time
No, they do not take advantage of my strong qualities
What is the usual reaction to your first advice?
A rejection of my first advice and then explaining why that wouldn't work by adding details
Mostly answering my many follow up questions
You're a direct person, and as such you enjoy finding the quickest and most direct options to solve problems. You don't like to get bogged down with the heaps of details every situation seems to create. People make things too complicated, is your stand on things, when simple solutions are staring them in the face.
Those who come to you for advice will find an advisor with strong and definite answers. If they don't want a really good direct approach, they shouldn't come to you. You may be a bit impatient and sometimes fail to see the small issues that make these direct approaches hard for some people, expecting them to be able to do what you do. It would be wise to take a deep breath and try to look at the problem as they would before cutting to your solution.
You feel as most people misrepresent their real problems. For most problems, there is underlying cause. Sometimes, if we look at it, we find there was no problem, or the problem was a different one to begin with, requiring a different solution.
You like to confront people with the truths of their issues, to talk to them like a therapist or counselor would, which is why you'd make a great one. You're very interested in people's emotions and motives for doing things, and so your advice will probably be based on such observations.
You rely on your logic to solve most of your problems, and you use the same technique when giving advice to others, as you feel it has served you well. When someone comes to you with a problem, you look at it from all angles, ask many questions, peel unhelpful emotions away and look at it under the cold light of reason.
You will then give the most objective, helpful answer you can give. It will be realistic and merciless, but will also be very thought out and measured, based on your best logic and a real desire to help this person by providing them with the best solution you can come up with for their specific problem.
You have a bit of a reputation for thinking outside the box. So much so that sometimes the box is only an idea. Sometimes it only has 3 sides and calls itself Philip! The point is, if people want the advice most people give - they don't come to you. They come to you when they want to hear the most creative, unorthodox advice they ever heard, and they know they can get it from you.
It's not really something you control most of the time, it just comes down to the way you think, and you're an original, there is no doubt. Some of your words of advice may miss the target by a mile, but some are absolute genius, and you yourself never know which will come out of your mouth.