Wins Jokes

Man wins award after he died eating appetizers at a Mediterranean restaurant
It was a Post-Hummus award.
What’s the difference between a football (soccer) referee and a politician?
When the referee gets paid at least someone wins.
“Here’s something to think about: How come you never see a headline like ‘Psychic Wins Lottery’?”
Jay Leno
Jim ordered a racehorse online
A thoroughbred sold in it's prime.
Now just for a laugh
They sent a giraffe
But it wins by a neck every time.

(Ray Gridley)
Q. What do they call the gorilla marathon runner who only wins when it's pouring outdoors?
A. The raining chimp-ion.
Q: What do you call a mummy who wins the lottery?
A: A lucky stiff
What is it called when a cat wins a dog show? A CAT-HAS-TROPHY!
Why did the tree go to the dentist? To get a root canal.
What is it called when a cat wins a dog show? A CAT-HAS-TROPHY! How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogey in it!
Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death. He wins fair and square.
Chuck Norris plays russian roulette with a fully loded revolver... and wins.
What do you say when a fruit wins the talent show? How about them apples?
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