Weigh

What do fish use to weigh themselves?
Scales!
How do you measure the heaviness of a red hot chili pepper?
Give it a weigh, give it a weigh, give it a weigh now.
How much does a corn flake weigh?
1 Kelloggram.
How much does a Polar Bear weigh?
I don't know.
About ten pounds less than you, fat-ass.
Who do fish always know how much they weigh? Because they have their own scales.
Which weighs more, a ton of feathers or a ton of bricks? Neither, they both weigh a ton!
What weighs more: a pound of logs or a pound of leaves? They weigh the same.