Vibrator

The Humming Sound
The Humming Sound A mother was walking down the hall when she heard a humming sound coming from her daughter's bedroom. When she opened the door she found her daughter naked on the bed with a vibrator. "What are you doing?!?" she exclaimed. The daughter replied, "I'm 35 and still living at home with my parents and this is the closest I'll ever get to a husband." Later that week the father was in the kitchen and heard a humming sound coming from the basement. When he went downstairs, he found his daughter naked on the sofa with her vibrator. "What are you doing?" he exclaimed. The daughter replied, "I'm 35 and still living at home with my parents and this is the closest I'll ever get to a husband." A couple of days later the mother heard the humming sound again, this time in the living room. In there, she found her husband watching sports on television with the vibrator buzzing away beside him. "What are YOU doing?" she exclaimed. "Watching the game with my son-in-law."
What does a homeless woman use for a vibrator? Two flies in a bottle.
What did the banana say to the vibrator? Why are YOU shaking? She's going to eat me.
The Old Lady and the Bold Question
The Old Lady and the Bold Question A little old lady with blue hair entered a se* shop and asked in a quivering voice, “Yy-youuuung man, dd-do y-you, sell-l d-didildoes h-hhhere?” The salesman, somewhat taken aback by the little old lady’s appearance in his shop answered, “Uh, yes ma’am, we do.” The little lady, holding her quivering hands about 10 inches apart asked, “Dddd-do y-you ha-ave any ab-bb-bout th-this lon-ong?” “Well... yes ma’am, a few of them are about that big.” “D-do aa-ny of them ha-ave a v-v-v-vibra-a-ator?” “Yes ma’am, one of them does.” “W-w-ell, h-how d-do yo-ou t-turn it off?”
Why did God even create men?
Because He couldn’t figure out how to make a vibrator that would mow the lawn.