Why did the rooster cross the road?
He heard there were some hot chicks on the other side.
Why did the electrical cords break up? There was no spark between them.”
There are three kinds of people in this world:
Those who can count, and those who can't.
There are 10 types of people in this world. Those that know binary, and those that don't.
A Roman walks into a bar and asks for a martinus. "You mean martini?" the bartender asks. The Roman replies, "Slow down there! I'll let you know when I want more."
What does a dyslexic, agnostic, insomniac do at night? He stays up wondering if there really is a dog.
Heisenberg was speeding down the highway. A cop pulls him over and says "Do you have any idea how fast you were going back there?" Heisenberg says, "No, but I knew where I was."
How does Robin Hood get from here to there?
In an “arrow plane.”
I was surprised when I saw a boat in the driveway so I asked my wife about it.
She said there was a great sail.
Whale, hello there.
Which color is a zebra's base color? The debate is endless, and there is no clear answer.
It both is and isn't a black-and-white issue.
I saw a guy trying to cross a really busy street. Trying to be helpful, I said, “You know, there is a zebra crossing 50ft ahead.”
He said, “I hope he’s having a better luck than I am.”
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Toucan who?
Toucan play at that game!
I got fired from the bomb disposal squad
Too bad, I had a blast working there.
Pre pear yourself for a bad pun.

Dad: Is that a pear?
*Dad points to pear on the kitchen counter.

Child: Yea...

Dad: Then why is there only one?