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Saw

One Liners and Short Jokes
I saw a homeless dude and gave him a dollar.
Then I saw a homeless woman and gave her $0.77.
Beach Puns
I was at the beach and saw this guy in the water yelling, “Help, shark! Help!
I just laughed because I knew that shark wasn’t going to help him.
Boat Puns
I was surprised when I saw a boat in the driveway so I asked my wife about it.
She said there was a great sail.
I took my boat out to go fishing today. I looked over and saw my neighbor’s dock was parallel to mine.
I guess I found my self in a real “para-docks”
Bomb Puns
I saw a headline in the newspaper that said someone made a bomb out of nitrous oxide.
This is no laughing matter.
Electricity Puns
A wind turbine saw a solar panel at an energy convention. He leaned in and shouted, Hey, I’m a big fan!”
Train Puns
I saw a guy on the train holding a newspaper in front of his face.
He was behind The Times.
What did the monster say when he saw a rush hour train full of passengers? Oh good! A chew chew train!
Jokes For Women
I told my boyfriend we could watch a dirty movie for his birthday and do what we saw in the video.
He was super excited... until I screwed the pizza guy.
Zebra Puns
Thought I saw a zebra in a field near my house recently, turned out to be a horse in his pyjamas.
Why did the lion cross the road? Because he saw a zebra-crossing...
I saw a guy trying to cross a really busy street. Trying to be helpful, I said, “You know, there is a zebra crossing 50ft ahead.”
He said, “I hope he’s having a better luck than I am.”
Diving Puns
Brother: "I saw a seahorse scuba diving"
Dad: "Wow that's amazing, I didn't realise they had the technology."
Dolphin Puns
Why did the dolphin blush?
Because it saw the ocean’s bottom!
Pear Puns
Everyday for lunch I like to eat two pears, and my dad knows this.
One day I saw him dropping two pears into a bunch of brown paper bags.

“What are you doing?” I asked him.

“Preparing.”
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