Expected Jokes

Why did the woman go outdoors with her purse open?
Because she expected some change in the weather.
I expected some baggage with our relationship but I didn’t expect the cargo of the Titanic to come floating to the surface.
What's long, surprisingly bigger than expected, comes in different colors, and everyone wants a ride from?
A limousine.
Someone vandalized my keyboard leaving only 1 button.
Surprisingly, the police were more thorough in the investigation than I expected. They even asked to see my colon.
I expected a call last night, so I slept with my phone under my pillow.
When I woke up it was gone, and there was a dollar coin in its place?!
Must have been the Bluetooth Fairy...
Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?
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