Do you like the internet? Because I can put you on there if you come back to my place.
"Want to come see my HARD DRIVE? I promise it isn't 3.5 inches and it ain't floppy."
Why wouldn’t the Moon come to the Sun’s funeral?
It isn’t a mourning person
The sun replies: I hurt everyone when they come close to me.
What did the bat say to the friend who itched and squirmined?
Come back when you have washed out the virmin.
"Reti or not, here I come!"
Guy walks into a tailor shop to pick up his suit. The tailor hands him a jacket and pair of pants. The guy says “But I had a 3-piece suit.”
Tailor says “The vest is yet to come.”
“Here’s something to think about: How come you never see a headline like ‘Psychic Wins Lottery’?”
Jay Leno
Excuse me waiter, I have a question about the house salad.
Does it come with window dressing?
What goes up when rain starts to come down?
How will you come to know when the moon will go broke? It would happen when moon is down to its last quarter.
Why does the Norwegian navy have barcodes on the side of their ships?
So when they come back to port they can scandinavian.
Nurse: You can come by at 6 today. Very little patients today.

Man: What happened to the normal sized patients?
What will you do if you come across a green alien? I’ll simply wait until it’s ripe.
How will you save yourself if you come across an aggressive alien? Give him some space.