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Lot Jokes

Funny Aging Quotes
"I was thinking about how people seem to read the bible a lot more as they get older, and then it dawned on me—they’re cramming for their final exam."- George Carlin
Pot Puns
Wife is frying a lot of mushrooms in a tiny pan.
Me: Doesn't look like you have mushroom left in there.
Literary Pick Up Lines
Hey cutie, I Sense you have a lot of Sensibility. Was that too Austen-tatious of me to point out?
If I Had a Dollar... Jokes
If I had a nickel for every COVID-19 joke I know, I could buy a whole lot of toilet paper.
Food Quotes
"You can tell a lot about a fellow's character by his way of eating jelly beans."
— Ronald Reagan
“The key to my heart looks a whole lot like a plate of pasta.”
― Unknown
Cherry Puns
Cherries are actually great at a lot of different sports. Their favorite one, in case you were wondering, is archerry.
Movie Pick Up Lines
“I couldn’t help but notice that you look a lot like my next girlfriend.”
- Will Smith, Hitch (2005)
Friendship Quotes
“I don’t have a lot of friends but I have the best friends because I choose quality over quantity.”
— Unknown
Classic Pick Up Lines
I know somebody that thinks they might like you a lot. And if I wasn’t so shy, I would tell you who it is.
Onion Puns
What is the onion that laughs a lot and is small and white in color? It is a tickled onion.
On my farm, an entire lot of onions had some allergic reactions that broke out in chives!
Strawberry Puns
Strawberries have berry good eyesight because they are packed with a lot of Vitamin See.
Funny Groucho Marx Quotes
"Funny, I've met a lot of pin-up girls, but I've never been able to pin one down."
"Anyone who says he can see through women is missing a lot."