Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
God grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.
There was a young lady of Cork, Whose Pa made a fortune in pork. He bought for his daughter, A tutor who taught her, To balance green peas on her fork.