Common Jokes

"I can tell by your sarcastic undertones, rude comments, and sheer lack of common decency that we should be best friends."
— Unknown
"There is still no cure for the common birthday." - John Glenn
Why are shovels, trowels, and spades so common in down-to-earth novels and movies?
Because they're plot devices.
"What does the letter "A" have in common with a flower?
They both have bees coming after them."
- Kim Roblin
I'm wearing green, you're wearing green, we have so much in common we should go out sometime.
What was the most common game played by Greek Gods?
Hydra and seek.
You and the sun have one thing in common. You are both radiant.
Do you breathe oxygen? We have so much in common.
Baby, I'm like efavirenz. I can decrease your odds of nightmares, but you still may have strong vivid dreams about me — a very common side effect.
All the peanuts decided to start a social nutwork where they would all link up for a common good and even advocate for their rights.
What do the peanuts and walnuts have in common? They are both nuts.
Lots of peas work as spies. Espea-onage is very common.
What does a straw and a view have in common?
You can get a paper straw and you can also get pay per view.
What do prison tennis matches and strawberry jam have in common?
Cons-serve
Tennis matches and strawberry jam have one thing in common. Cons-serve.