Why did the lettuce and the mushroom break up? The lettuce was pretty but the mushroom did not have much room for her in his life.
Why can’t a Christmas tree sew? It keeps dropping its needles.
What did the teacher say when he sent the naughty student out of the (mush)room? - You’re in big truffle young man!
How do you describe an acorn in one sentence? In a nutshell, it is an oak tree.
Where does a snowman keep his money?
In a snow bank.
How do you know you’re in love with a flower?
Not a daisy goes by where you don’t think of them.
What did the flower do when she was challenged?
Rose to the occasion.
What did the tree tell the drill? You bore me.
What do you call a giant mushroom? Hu-fungus.
Why couldn’t the oak tree make friends? All of the other trees thought that he was a bit shady.
What does the mushroom say to his lover? – “I have so mush-room in my heart for you, baby!”
Did you hear the joke about the elephant who was stuck in a tree last spring? To get down, she had to sit down on a branch and wait until fall.
There’s two balloons in the desert. One says look out for that cactus!
The other goes What Cactussssss...
Where did the Adansonia tree go to get a quick trim? To the baobarber.
What is it called when a tree stabs his friend in the back?
A be-tree-yal
What is a birch’s favorite dinosaur? The Tree
Rex.
What do you call a snowman party?
A snowball.
I was going to try putting a mushroom into my cola. I wanted to be a my cola gist.
Why was the pine tree always in trouble? It kept being knotty.
What does a flower write on their valentine?
Aloe you vera much.
What type of mushrooms can you put on a jacket? Button mushrooms.
What is a flower’s favorite Journey song?
Don’t stop be-leafing.
What do you call ten Arctic hares hopping backwards through the snow together?
A receding hare line.
What pickup line did the flower use on Tinder?
Are you a DAMNdelion?
How do you know flowers are capable of kissing?
They have tulips.
I was not allowed to do my stand up act at the mushroom comedy show. I guess I am not a fungi.
Where do the mushroom family keep their umbrellas, coats and shoes? In their porch-ini!
Today isn’t the day to be making jokes about the weather.
It’s snow joke.
The forager was in such mixed moods this morning and we guessed he picked and ate the wrong class of mushrooms.
I was at a bar and heard a band playing a Queen cover. I asked them what the name of their band was. They are called the Champignons my friend.
What do you see when an elephant hides behind a tree?
The trunks
Today I helped father-in-law to fix his plants
it was very grounding.
How do you get into the mush-room? Ring the porta-bella.
Why did the sapling jump in the ocean? He wanted to swim with the manatrees.
What sort of cakes do snowmen like?
The ones with thick icing!
What’s an ig?
A snow house without a loo!
How many lips does a flower have?
Tulips.
What do you call an old snowman?
Water.
Why did the flower take her husband back after he cheated?
She rose above it.
What do you call a tree with no tinsel, baubles, or topping?
A tree.
Getting my toy drone stuck in the tree isn’t the worst thing that happened to me today.
But it’s definitely up there.
How would you scare a snowman?
Get a hairdryer!
Why did the banana tree have to make a doctor’s appointment during the hurricane? Her fruit was peeling under the weather.
What types of plants do you get after you plant kisses? Tulips.
Never go on a date with a cactus
They'll spike your drink
Did you hear about the loggers who stopped cutting down the forest? The trees really felt re-leafed.
What type of motorcycle do London Plane trees like to ride? Treeumph.
What does an alcoholic flower say when they reach out for help?
Lilac the ability to stop.
What is a mountains favorite type of candy?
Snow caps.
My friend has just won the tallest Christmas tree competition
I thought to myself, 'How can you top that?