What do snowmen wear on their heads?
Ice caps.
What does a flower do when they get caught in a lie?
Backpetal.
Why did the Platanus occidentalis have to go to the doctor more than the other trees? Because it was always sycamore.
What do you see when an elephant hides behind a tree?
The trunks
Why couldn’t the oak tree make friends? All of the other trees thought that he was a bit shady.
What sort of ball doesn’t bounce?
A snowball!
Are you a cactus?
Because you're a prick
How do you know flowers are capable of kissing?
They have tulips.
The fungi turned down seconds at dinner because he never had mushroom.
You can virtually stay in any room. The only one you can’t is the mush-room because it is reserved for fungi.
Did you hear about the flower who never bloomed?
It was a bud omen.
How much does a flower love their friends?
Bunches.
What did the beaver tell the tree? It has really been nice gnawing you.
What do chic evergreens wear for cruelty-free fashion? Faux fir.
. How can you easily identify a dogwood tree? By listening to the bark.
I was at a bar and heard a band playing a Queen cover. I asked them what the name of their band was. They are called the Champignons my friend.
Which tree is more annoying, pine or oak?
Pine. Because pine needles while oak leaves.
What do you call an Eskimo cow?
An Eskimoo!
Did you hear the joke about the elephant who was stuck in a tree last spring? To get down, she had to sit down on a branch and wait until fall.
What did the tree tell the drill? You bore me.
What is the favorite Mexican food of snowman?
Brrrr – itos.
I was thinking about using a mushroom to poison someone. My morel stopped me.
How do you get down from a tree? You can’t because down comes from ducks.
What does the mushroom say to his lover? – “I have so mush-room in my heart for you, baby!”
Why do some trees hate playing checkers? Because they are true chess-nuts.
What do snowmen eat for lunch?
Icebergers!
What type of diet did the snowman go on?
The Meltdown Diet.
What do you call a nice tree that does not have any teeth? Sweetgums.
What do trees drink at their parties? Root beer.
What do you get when you plant a Donut?
A pastree.
What do you call a slow skier?
A slopepoke!
Why are trees so silly? All of their puns arboring and acorny.
What do you call a tree with no tinsel, baubles, or topping?
A tree.
Why do trees like to watch Star Trek? They really relate to the Captain’s log.
Why is it always quiet in the forest? Because all of the trees sleep like a dog.
Why are we only concerned about snowmen not snowwomen?
Because only men are stupid enough to stand out in the snow without a coat.
What did the mushroom request when booking his hotel? A shroom with a view, please!
How did the pines and firs end their war? With a tree-ty.
What time is it when little white flakes fall past the classroom window?
Snow and Tell.
What can you catch in the winter with your eyes closed?
A cold.
What do you call a dinosaur who sat on a cactus?
A megalo-sore-ass.
What do plants and homies have in common?
I love watching them grow.
Whats a bad flower pick-up line?
Lets put our tulips together?
Who did Prince Mushroom fall in love with at the royal ball? - Chanterella!
What do you call a gangsta snowman?
Froze-T.
My father cooked us mushrooms. Later he asked "Having fun guys"?
During the contribution’s session, the mushroom family never gave a lot. They were just two spore.
What did the tree say when it fell down?
"Call pine one one!"
Did you hear about the flower who joined Tinder?
He just wants somebudy to love.
How does a bee travel to a tree? They get on the buzz.