What’s an ig?
A snow house without a loo!
Why was the tree doctor so good at his job? He could always get to the root of the problem.
I was thinking about using a mushroom to poison someone. My morel stopped me.
What did the teacher say when he sent the naughty student out of the (mush)room? - You’re in big truffle young man!
Did you hear the joke about the elephant who was stuck in a tree last spring? To get down, she had to sit down on a branch and wait until fall.
What do you say to a flower after a breakup?
Get clover it.
Where did the Adansonia tree go to get a quick trim? To the baobarber.
How does a bee travel to a tree? They get on the buzz.
Why didn’t Guns N Roses turn up for the gig when it was snowing?
Axel Froze.
Why do trees always hate taking tests? Because they keep getting stumped by the questions.
What looks like half a pine tree? The other half.
Not many people liked the new tree I planted.
It wasn’t very poplar.
Why did the Sugar Maple have to go to the dentist? It really needed a root canal.
The reason why mushrooms are always welcome even in high-end parties is because everybody believes they are really fun-guys.
What did the dessert say to the Granny Smith tree?
You’re the apple of my pie.
What sort of cakes do snowmen like?
The ones with thick icing!
What did Sherlock Holmes say when he caught the Christmas tree bandit? It was elemen-tree, my dear Watt-son.
What do you see when an elephant hides behind a tree?
The trunks
Why did the frog lose his job on the mushroom farm? He stole the toads-tool.
What side of the tree contains the most leaves? The outside, of course.
What's the difference between a BMW and a Cactus?
Pricks are on the outside of Cactuses.
Why are trees such great thieves? They really have sticky fingers.
A team of mushrooms was playing basketball against a team of cabbages. The mushrooms won. Everyone cheered for the champignons.
What pickup line did the flower use on Tinder?
Are you a DAMNdelion?
How do trees get onto the internet? They just log on.
How did the mushroom end up on a vacation abroad? It was just a spore of the moment decision!
A woman who gave birth in a tree was sent to jail
She was charged with treeson
Why was the pine tree always in trouble? It kept being knotty.
How does a mushroom decorate a home? With toadstools.
Why was the sapling crying to her mom? She said the big trees wouldn’t leaf her alone.
What do you call a snowman with a six pack?
An abdominal snowman.
Did you hear about the guy who fell in love with a tree? They say he was a tree hugger.
Why do trees have to drink responsibly? Otherwise, they become a bunch of trunk idiots.
What do you call a martial arts expert in a tree?
Bruce Leaf.
Did you hear about the loggers who stopped cutting down the forest? The trees really felt re-leafed.
Why was the tree so embarrassed during the winter? After her leaves fell, she felt naked.
What do you call a snowman party?
A snowball.
What do snowmen eat for breakfast?
Frosted Flakes.
What type of motorcycle do London Plane trees like to ride? Treeumph.
Why did the aspen date the poplar? She really found him to be in-tree-guing.
What do flowers study in college?
STEM.