What does a triangle palm like to study in school? Trigonometree.
What do chic evergreens wear for cruelty-free fashion? Faux fir.
Did you hear about the flower who gave an ultimatum to her husband?
She told him once and floral.
Not many people liked the new tree I planted.
It wasn’t very poplar.
The reason why mushrooms are always welcome even in high-end parties is because everybody believes they are really fun-guys.
Why do toadstools grow so close to each other? They do not need mushroom to grow.
What is a cactus’ favorite MC Hammer song?
Can’t touch this.
Why can’t a Christmas tree sew? It keeps dropping its needles.
Why are trees such great drivers? They always take the shortest root.
What did the tree say after someone hit it? We should really call the copse.
What type of room do you eat? A mush room.
Why couldn’t the oak tree make friends? All of the other trees thought that he was a bit shady.
Why are trees so silly? All of their puns arboring and acorny.
What’s a flower’s favorite band?
Guns n’ Roses.
What is a mountains favorite type of candy?
Snow caps.
What does a flower do when they get caught in a lie?
Backpetal.
Why do trees always get hired? They have the right qual-leaf-ications.
What looks like half a pine tree? The other half.
Why are plants the best chefs?
They’re succulent.
The fungi turned down seconds at dinner because he never had mushroom.
Why won’t the mushroom buy a couch? - He prefers toadstools.
What type of car did the mushroom drive by in? A spores car.
Why did the sapling jump in the ocean? He wanted to swim with the manatrees.
Why do trees always walk so slowly? All they can do is lumber around.
What do you call a human that's now a cactus?
A transplant.
Why are trees so active in politics? They really like grass roots movements.
What do you call an old snowman?
Water.
What happened when the snowgirl had a fight with the snowboy?
She gave him the cold shoulder.
What does a flower write on their valentine?
Aloe you vera much.
Why do trees like to watch Star Trek? They really relate to the Captain’s log.
Did you hear the joke about the elephant who was stuck in a tree last spring? To get down, she had to sit down on a branch and wait until fall.
What did the trees wear when they went to a pool party? Swimming trunks.
My friend has just won the tallest Christmas tree competition
I thought to myself, 'How can you top that?
Why are trees a popular Christmas decoration? They look good in boughs.
What did the flower say to his wife when he brought her home a present?
I hope thistle cheer you up.
Why was the evergreen so lonely in high school? She was always pining to become a part of the poplar kids.
Why are flowers so good at problem-solving?
They know how to nip things in the bud.
What did the flower tell his son before a big game?
I’m rooting for you.
How do you know if there’s a snowman in your bed?
You wake up wet!
Did you hear about the aspen who fell for the loggers’ scam? The copse wood not believe she fell for it.
When darkness sets in, fungi much like many other organisms go to sleep, but in mush-rooms.
Where did the Adansonia tree go to get a quick trim? To the baobarber.
What are the best mushrooms to have with a jacket potato? Button mushrooms!
A woman who gave birth in a tree was sent to jail
She was charged with treeson
Are you a cactus?
Because you're a prick
During the contribution’s session, the mushroom family never gave a lot. They were just two spore.
Why are bad knitters and Christmas trees alike? They both drop their needles.
How does a mushroom decorate a home? With toadstools.
What is a flower’s favorite Journey song?
Don’t stop be-leafing.
I told my friend a tree pun.
He was stumped.
What did the tree do when it found that the bank had closed? It starts a new branch.