What time is it when little white flakes fall past the classroom window?
Snow and Tell.
What does a flower therapist ask her patients?
Are you feeling bouquet?
I always invite the mushroom to my party because he is such a fun-guy.
Did you hear about the loggers who stopped cutting down the forest? The trees really felt re-leafed.
When darkness sets in, fungi much like many other organisms go to sleep, but in mush-rooms.
If a tree had a mouth, wood it bark?
Never go on a date with a cactus
They'll spike your drink
What kind of money snowmen use in the North Pole?
Cold cash!
Why won’t the mushroom buy a couch? - He prefers toadstools.
I was going to try putting a mushroom into my cola. I wanted to be a my cola gist.
Look Honey, a cactus!
I haven't seen that many pricks in one place since your family was in for Thanksgiving!
What does the mushroom say to his lover? – “I have so mush-room in my heart for you, baby!”
Did you hear about the flower who gave an ultimatum to her husband?
She told him once and floral.
How do you know flowers are capable of kissing?
They have tulips.
How does a Snowman get to work?
By icicle.
What types of mushrooms do vegetarians avoid? Oyster mushrooms.
Why did the banana tree have to make a doctor’s appointment during the hurricane? Her fruit was peeling under the weather.
Did you hear about the guy who fell in love with a tree? They say he was a tree hugger.
Why did the Platanus occidentalis have to go to the doctor more than the other trees? Because it was always sycamore.
What did the mushroom request when booking his hotel? A shroom with a view, please!
What flowering plant is an amazing equestrian? The horse chestnut.
What does the birch like to study in school? Chemistree.
How would you scare a snowman?
Get a hairdryer!
You can virtually stay in any room. The only one you can’t is the mush-room because it is reserved for fungi.
The fungi turned down seconds at dinner because he never had mushroom.
What did the grouchy mushroom say to the loud mushroom? - Put a cap on it.
What did Betula pendula tell her little sister when she was annoyed? Leaf me alone, birch.
What type of room do you eat? A mush room.
Why was the evergreen so lonely in high school? She was always pining to become a part of the poplar kids.
Where does a snowman keep his money?
In a snow bank.
Why are trees the largest plant? Because they are truly tree-mendous.
How do two flowers greet each other?
Hey bud, how’s it growing?
What can you catch in the winter with your eyes closed?
A cold.
What was the conversation like at the dinner party with all the boring flowers?
Like pollen teeth.
In the mushroom bus, one mushroom said to the other, "Please scoot over, there is not mush room."
What do flowers study in college?
STEM.
What did the flower say to his wife when he brought her home a present?
I hope thistle cheer you up.
What kind of alcohol do flowers drink?
Rosé.
I just found out what animal’s been getting into my avocado plants...
It was a guaca-mole.
Why couldn’t the oak tree make friends? All of the other trees thought that he was a bit shady.
Why was the pine tree always in trouble? It kept being knotty.
How do you keep the snow from giving you cold feet?
Don’t go around BRRfooted!
What does a flower say when they’re surprised?
What in carnation!
Where do the mushroom family keep their umbrellas, coats and shoes? In their porch-ini!
Are you a cactus?
Because you're a prick
What did one cactus say to the other cactus ?
"Lookin sharp !"
What do you give to a sick citrus tree to make it feel better? Lemon aid.
How do trees get onto the internet? They just log on.
Over the years, my neighbour has buried his deceased pets in his backyard, and to his surprise, a plant has sprung up.
It's a Cemer Tree.
Why do trees always walk so slowly? All they can do is lumber around.