I heard that burglars used grass to pick a lock and gain entry to a local house, but the evidence may have been planted.
Neighbor Dad 1: How often do you cut the grass? Your lawn looks so much better than mine!
Neighbor Dad 2: That's on a need to mow basis.
My family wanted me to cut the grass, but I couldn't get myself mow-tivated.
The shrubs were gearing up for a fight with the grass, but they never saw the blades come in.
What did one blade of grass say to another about the lack of rain?
I guess we'll just have to make dew.
In my village, there is a farmer who takes his cows to refill their food at the grass station.
How does Santa look after the grass on his three gardens? Ho, ho ho.
The clients who buy from our gardening store are grass-ured that the artificial lawn grass would not lose its color with use.
The feds were on a global hunt for a cow who was known to hide behind foliage. They finally located her in Moss-cow.
Grass absorbs nutrients always by the process of grass-imilation.
We just got a new chicken-proof lawn, it's impekkable.
During the pandemic, all the children asked to draw pictures of the different types of grass. The children had to submit their grass-essments online.
The Azteca Stadium in Mexico has been so neglectfully maintained that there are foot-long grasses on the pitch. Now we call it the Grass-teca Stadium.
My father decided to mow the lawn today. As he mowed, all the grass blade.
What do you call the people that you eat grass and produce milk alongside?
Cow-workers!
It's been a while since I heard jokes about people sitting on wet morning grass.
They're over dew.
The worst thing about living next door to a good gardener is that the grass is always greener on the other side.
All the grasses were bumping into each other because the grass-light wasn't working in the streets.
I'm like a cow in tall grass,
I'm utterly tickled to be here.
I'd cut the grass but it's against the lawn.
My friends were talking about what different colours grass they preferred.
I told them they were being gracist.