Me: "Hello? 911? Emergency! The neighbors house is on fire!"
Dispatcher: "Did you discover the fire?"
Me: "No! Prometheus! but what does he have to do with this?"
I was fired from an insect repellent company for being dyslexic, so I smashed all their computers.
There’s no files on me.
What do you call a ghoul who sits too close to the fire?
A toasty ghosty.
Why was the food critic fired?
They didn't reference their sauces
Iron Man's favourite Xmas gifts this year were socks that fire from his feet.
He called them missile toes.
My boss told me that he was going to fire the person with the worst posture
I have a hunch, it might be me.
I got fired from my job because I kept asking my customers whether they would prefer “Smoking” or “Non-smoking”.
Apparently the correct terms are “Cremation” and “Burial”.
Why was the boxer fired from his job?
He never punched out.
What is fire to a pyromaniac?
Just a warm-up.
I just got fired from my job at the keyboard factory.
They told me I wasn't putting in enough shifts.
Did you hear the was a fire at a used furniture store and two people died next door?
It was due the second hand smoke
I got fired from the unemployment office on Friday.
My boss said, “Clean out your desk, and I’ll see you in the office on Monday.”
I went to the shooting range for the first time, but I couldn’t get my gun to fire
I had to read the trouble shooting section in the manual
It was a great fire. It was a bon-fire.
Why did the vegan get fired ?
His job performance did not meat expectations.
I dropped my steak into the fire.
Well done, me, well done.
My Dermatologist was fired today...
He made too many rash decisions.
What did the water in the fire truck say when it came to a sudden stop?
I'm baffled.
I saw a cow on fire ther dayand so I put it out.
Guess you could call it a rare experience.
There was a fire at the yodeling school. Everyone was asked to exit in an orderly orderly orderly manner.
My grand father always said "fight Fire with Fire".
He was a great man but a terrible Fireman
Did you hear about the fire at the circus?
It was InTents.