My boss told me that he was going to fire the person with the worst posture
I have a hunch, it might be me.
I stole fire from the gods.
But I couldn't fence it. It was too hot.
My boss has just fired me for making too many Asian jokes.
Oh well!! That's the end of my Korea.
General: "Fire at will!"
Soldier: "Which one's Will?"
What did the water in the fire truck say when it came to a sudden stop?
I'm baffled.
Iron Man's favourite Xmas gifts this year were socks that fire from his feet.
He called them missile toes.
Why was the boxer fired from his job?
He never punched out.
What do you call a ghoul who sits too close to the fire?
A toasty ghosty.
I got fired from the Calendar Factory yesterday
They say it's because I took a day off.
Did you hear about the fire at the circus?
It was InTents.
Most people have off on Independence Day. Except fire.
Fire-works on 4th of July.
Why Did the Milkman Get Fired?
He was skimming off the top.
A french farmer who owned an olive plantation had a huge fire
He was extremely sad, he had lost his all his huile d'olive.
When Smokey died in a forest fire, how did his body get to the cemetery ?
Pallbears.
My fire tonight...
Was lit!
What do you call an 'O' on fire?
Flamingo.
I was fired from an insect repellent company for being dyslexic, so I smashed all their computers.
There’s no files on me.
My son and I went camping yesterday and when he asked me how to start a campfire, I explained, "You can start a fire by rubbing two sticks together, but make sure they’re the same..."
"Then you’ll have a match."
Why was the Blonde fired from the M&M factory?
She kept throwing away the W's.
I got fired from my job because I kept asking my customers whether they would prefer “Smoking” or “Non-smoking”.
Apparently the correct terms are “Cremation” and “Burial”.
There was a terrible fire at the shoe factory today...
Over a million soles were lost.
What did the beaver say when it saw it's home on fire?
Hot Dam!