Colonoscopy Short Jokes

Welcome to the most painful section of short jokes and puns - The Colonoscopy Short Jokes!

Colonoscopy Short Jokes

Your doctor called with your colonoscopy results. Good news – they found your head.
"Straight ahead for a bit then there's a sharp left, so take it slowly." I said.
"The screen is for MY benefit, Mr. Anderson," said the doctor, "and this isn't my first colonoscopy."
What do you call an Irish proctologist?
Colin O'Scopy.
I have inner beauty.
And I have the video from my colonoscopy to prove it.
I had a colonoscopy recently and believe it or not getting the camera up there doesn't hurt as much as you might think.
It's the crew that's the killer.
The doctor told me he found something alarming in my colonoscopy.
Turns out it was a clock.
A proctologist is about to write a something on his patient's notes but when he goes to take his pen out of his pocket he realizes it's actually his thermometer that's there.

He says, "Darn, some a**hole has my pen."
That new vet really screwed up my pig's colonoscopy
He's pretty ham-fisted
My father had a colonoscopy.
Turns out he had colon cancer so he had to have surgery to remove the tumor. Now he has a semi-colon.
What should the real name for a colonoscopy be?
A colonoscopoo.
I forgot to pay my colonoscopy bill.
Now I’m in arrears.
I just got my colonoscopy results:
The doctor gave me two thumbs up!
Did you hear about the golfer who started a colonoscopy clinic?
He does 18 holes a day.
Yesterday I paid a stranger to knock me unconscious,
shove a foreign object up my butt and film the whole thing!
Or as my doctor insists on calling it... a colonoscopy
"Your Colonoscopy went well, I understand." Said Sherlock to Watson.
"No s**t, Sherlock."
I had a colonoscopy yesterday and I think the doctor must have got carried away.
I said to him, "Can you back that up a little, it's irritating my tonsils."
What's the difference between a colonoscopy and an endoscopy?
The taste.
Someone I know gave a really deep speech to convince me to go for a colonoscopy
What else can I say?
Something touched me deep inside.
I only lost 2 pounds while taking laxatives for a colonoscopy.
I guess I'm not as full of crap as I thought.
Had a colonoscopy the other day,
Worst dentist appointment I've ever had.