Telescope Jokes

My wife said she wants me to consider purchasing a decent telescope for the family to use.
I told her I’d look into it.
Baby you make my telescope expand.
Is that a telescope in your pants or are you just happy to see me?
I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
"You are adorable, mademoiselle. I study your feet with the microscope and your soul with the telescope."
― Victor Hugo, Les Misérables
If the Hubble Telescope got married...
It would be called the Hubby Telescope.
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