“The first time I see a jogger smiling, I’ll consider it.”
Joan Rivers
“Never follow anyone else’s path. Unless you’re in the woods and you’re lost and you see a path. Then by all means follow that path.”
Ellen DeGeneres
“Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet to see who they really are.”
Will Ferrell
“Tact is the ability to describe others as they see themselves.”
Abraham Lincoln
“Here’s something to think about: How come you never see a headline like ‘Psychic Wins Lottery’?”
Jay Leno