You can have that last bag of chips if I can bag your number.
Okay, hereโs the deal: Iโll let you take the last stuffed crust frozen pizza if you let me take you to dinner. At your house. Where weโll be having frozen pizza.
I was at a party last night, waiting my turn to get to the punch bowl. Everyone was being very polite, patient and not barging in. I thought to myself, "At last... a decent punchline"
I expected a call last night, so I slept with my phone under my pillow. When I woke up it was gone, and there was a dollar coin in its place?! Must have been the Bluetooth Fairy...
"The holy passion of friendship is so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime if not asked to lend money." โ Mark Twain
โSometimes me think, โWhat is friend?โ Then me say, โFriend is someone to share the last cookie with.โโ โ Cookie Monster
"This is the last straw!" I shouted to my wife as I put it in my drink...
I was walking home last night through the park, when this scary looking kid drew a knife on me... The little brat used a permanent marker and it was a bastard to wash it off.
Had to my dinner with just a knife and spoon last night... It wasn't easy, but that's a fork-gone conclusion.
Last night while cooking, my serving spoon's handle broke off. My husband walked in and said: How very un-ladle-like!
Took my giant spoon to my cooking class last night. It caused quite a stir.
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