Hey, Baby do you want to see what tricks my treat could do?
I wanna bob for your apples.
Just saw a burglar kicking his own door in.
I asked: “What are you doing?”
“Working from home.”
With all this spare time on their hands people are going to start pursuing their passions. I wouldn't be surprised to sudden explosion in the arts, a renewal in scientific interest, and a mass proliferation of original content.
A coronaissance, if you will.
I would totally carve your pumpkin.
They found a plant that cures COVID-19!
It’s called plant yourself on the couch.
Why can't corona virus jokes go viral?
Because people are laughing into their elbows.
Call me a pirate and give me that booty.
Girl, you make my crotch rise from the dead
I’m no vampire but I’m fine with getting no sleep and biting your neck all night.
Which Pokémon has Covid?
Pik-achoo.
I broke up with my girlfriend after she contracted the corona virus
I’ve decided to wash my hands of her.
As the local drunk, I'm quite worried about the corona virus.
It's got potential tequila lot of people.
What did the Indian boy say to his parent before going into self isolation?
Mumbai.
What does a person with Covid like to drink?
Coughy.
I want a taste of your Milky Way.
Is that a bat in your pocket, or does my costume excite you?
I went to the chemist today and asked the assistant "what kills the Corona Virus?"
She replied to me "Ammonia Cleaner"
I said "Oh, I am sorry, I thought you worked here."
I really hope corona virus can't spread through s*x
It would be so lonely being the last man on Earth.
Hey Baby, wanna find out why they call me Pumpkin-Head?
There’s no trick in these pants.
I really hope Santa can figure out how to make all his deliveries this year due to Covid-19......
I hear he just ran out of santa-tizer.
I got really good at telling them, so I’m being crowned the king of corona virus puns.
You’re all formally invited to attend my coronation.
My teen daughter was sent home from school for covid exposure.....
She’s now my quaranteen.
I got my COVID-19 vaccine from a "doctor" who approached me in a downtown alley after midnight, offering it for $50 cash.
It was a shot in the dark, but I took it.
The government announced that because of COVID, we can have gatherings of up to 5 people without issues.
Where the hell am I going to find 5 people without issues?
Did you know there are 206 bones in the human body? Would you mind one more?
Hey, my parents are out of town. That means we have the haunted mansion all to ourselves.
Why are people buying so much toilet paper because of the corona virus?
Because when one person sneezes, 100 people shit themselves.
Woke up with sweats afraid I'd contracted the corona virus...
Changed into jeans and was all good.
My daughter told me COVID stinks and she misses her teacher...
I told her "I Ms. your teacher too."
You know what they say... Big Feet.
Me: I'll have a Corona please.
Waiter: *Cough*
Me: Thank you.
Who is running the corona virus relief?
WHO??
Even after a decade or two, I think we will all remember this year forever.
I mean, hindsight is 2020.
I should have dressed up as a ghost tonight so I could let you under my sheets.
I just asked the wife to get into her nurse's uniform.
She said "Why? Are you feeling horny?"
"No we need bread!"
Nice pumpkins!
I sneezed in the bank today, it was the most attention I have received in the last 10 years.
Is it true what they say about the size of a man’s canine teeth?
Me, to my wife: They said that the Covid vaccines are safe and has no side effects.
My wife: Who did?
Me: Yep.
People with a cold - "I just want to stay in bed and do nothing, I feel terrible."
People with Corona Virus - "I feel terrible, I think I will go skiing in Austria, visit the Eiffel Tower and maybe do some white water rafting in Camino de Santiago."
While it’s taking a while for the Corona virus to reach other countries, China got it right off the bat.
Ok, so if the Corona Virus isn't about beer, why do I keep hearing about cases of it?
Why did the Chinese communist party try to cover up the outbreak of the corona virus disease?
They were afraid not everyone could get it.
With Corona Virus spreading, I never thought our deaths will also be..
“Made in China”
Are you dressed up as a tree? Cause you’re giving me wood.
Did you hear the new pop song about Covid?
...it's pretty catchy.
Listen to them, children of the night. Let’s give them some competition.
If Corona virus is just a beer virus..
Then it’s just a yeast infection!
Go to BabaMail
