Me: I'll have a Corona please.
Waiter: *Cough*
Me: Thank you.
You should dress up as a baker for Halloween with that set of buns.
Ok, so if the Corona Virus isn't about beer, why do I keep hearing about cases of it?
They found a plant that cures COVID-19!
It’s called plant yourself on the couch.
With Corona Virus spreading, I never thought our deaths will also be..
“Made in China”
What quarantine really taught me?
That you don't really need fun to have alcohol.
Why did Princess Leia contract coronavirus?
Because she went to woo Han.
Girl, are you the Wuhan Corona Virus?
Because you’re taking my breath away.
We are 11 days into self-isolation ands it is really upsetting me to witness my wife standing at the living room window gazing aimlessly into space with tears running down her cheeks.
Don’t get me wrong, I empathize with her. I’ve considered letting her in many times, but rules are rules.
I got my COVID-19 vaccine from a "doctor" who approached me in a downtown alley after midnight, offering it for $50 cash.
It was a shot in the dark, but I took it.
Did you hear the new pop song about Covid?
...it's pretty catchy.
Which Pokémon has Covid?
Pik-achoo.
What do you get when a raven flies into a group of 18 crows?
Corvid-19.
Is that a magic wand in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
Since i have COVID people tell me i enjoy bad music and movies
Guess i have become tasteless.
Hey, my parents are out of town. That means we have the haunted mansion all to ourselves.
My real costume is at home in a box under my bed.
I like my girls how I like my Covid.
19 and easily spread.
Due to covid most exotic dancers have been furloughed.
Basically, they’ve been stripped of their source of income.
John Travolta has been diagnosed with the Corona Virus.
He had chills that were multiplying.
There’s no trick in these pants.
Has Covid-19 forced you to wear glasses and a mask at the same time?
You may be entitled to condensation.
Corona crisis reaches new level:
Iran out of toilet paper.
Just saw a burglar kicking his own door in.
I asked: “What are you doing?”
“Working from home.”
With all this talk of Corona Virus, the people who make sanitising gel are rubbing their hands together.
Tom Hanks just got the Corona virus.
They had to lock the whole Cast Away.
This Corona virus is a blessing
My wife doesn't want to travel anywhere.
She no longer buys anything online, since everything comes from China.
she doesn't go to the mall to avoid the crowds.
she spends all of her time in a mask with her mouth closed.
Best thing that has ever happened to me.
Dad jokes are like Corona.
Everybody gets It but not everyone can laugh about It.
Why are people buying so much toilet paper because of the corona virus?
Because when one person sneezes, 100 people shit themselves.
What did the Indian boy say to his parent before going into self isolation?
Mumbai.
I was going to make a joke about losing your senses due to COVID.
But I decided it was poor taste.
As the local drunk, I'm quite worried about the corona virus.
It's got potential tequila lot of people.
Listen to them, children of the night. Let’s give them some competition.
While it’s taking a while for the Corona virus to reach other countries, China got it right off the bat.
Is that a bat in your pocket, or does my costume excite you?
That mask is becoming on you. If it were me, I’d be coming too.
I’m no vampire but I’m fine with getting no sleep and biting your neck all night.
I've taken up online yoga since the COVID-19 outbreak started.
It helps me namaste at home.
If Corona virus is just a beer virus..
Then it’s just a yeast infection!
I feel really bad for the class of 2020. They say the year really flies by.
I just didn’t realize it would Zoom.
Hey, Baby do you want to see what tricks my treat could do?
People with 20-20 vision..
Why you didn't warn us before??
Why can't corona virus jokes go viral?
Because people are laughing into their elbows.
I could tell you a COVID joke...
But it would take two weeks for you to get it.
You know why women's eyes are so noticeable these days?
It's the mask era.
Me, to my wife: They said that the Covid vaccines are safe and has no side effects.
My wife: Who did?
Me: Yep.
What do Saturday and Sunday have in common with the corona virus?
The weakend.
With Coronavirus and our impending doom, I guess no one really had 2020 vision after all.
Dolly Parton partially funded Moderna's COVID Vaccine.
It comes in two very large dosey-doses.
Did you know there are 206 bones in the human body? Would you mind one more?