Did you hear about the aspen who fell for the loggers’ scam? The copse wood not believe she fell for it.
Why was the tree so embarrassed during the winter? After her leaves fell, she felt naked.
I told my friend a tree pun.
He was stumped.
Did you hear about the guy who fell in love with a tree? They say he was a tree hugger.
What do you call a nice tree that does not have any teeth? Sweetgums.
What do aspens wear to school? A tree-shirt.
How did the pines and firs end their war? With a tree-ty.
Not many people liked the new tree I planted.
It wasn’t very poplar.
What has leaves, is green and a trunk? A houseplant heading on vacation.
Why was the dogwood always making bad choices? Because he kept barking up the wrong tree.
What is the hardest part about being a tree? You have so many limbs, but you still can’t walk.
What do you call a tree with no tinsel, baubles, or topping?
A tree.
What does a triangle palm like to study in school? Trigonometree.
What happened to the wooden car with a wooden engine and wheels? It wooden go at all.
What did the eskimo say when he chopped down a tree?
Tim-brrr
Is it hard to count conifers? It’s as simple as one, two, tree!
What do trees drink at their parties? Root beer.
What types of plants do you get after you plant kisses? Tulips.
What type of tree can be put inside your hand? A palm tree.
What is a birch’s favorite dinosaur? The Tree
Rex.
Did you hear the joke about the elephant who was stuck in a tree last spring? To get down, she had to sit down on a branch and wait until fall.
So I cut down a tree using my vision today
It’s true, I SAW it with my own eyes.
Why couldn’t the oak tree make friends? All of the other trees thought that he was a bit shady.
Did you hear about the big company that made syrup from contaminated trees? They maple their syrup from the shelves.
Why do some trees hate playing checkers? Because they are true chess-nuts.
Can you tell me what type of weeping tree this is? Yes, but you willow me one later.
What did the nut tree say when his wife left him? I walnut stand for this!
Why do trees always walk so slowly? All they can do is lumber around.
What do you give to a sick citrus tree to make it feel better? Lemon aid.
Why are bad knitters and Christmas trees alike? They both drop their needles.
Why was the evergreen so lonely in high school? She was always pining to become a part of the poplar kids.
Where do saplings graduate from? Elementree school.
What is it called when a tree has back problems?
ScoliOAKsis
What did the tree say when it fell down?
"Call pine one one!"
Why are trees the best frenemies? They are great at throwing shade.
Why did the sapling go to the doctor’s office? He was feeling a little green.
Why are dogwood trees amazing pets? They have a great bark and a wooden bite.
Which tree is more annoying, pine or oak?
Pine. Because pine needles while oak leaves.