What flowering plant is an amazing equestrian? The horse chestnut.
What is a birch’s favorite dinosaur? The Tree
Rex.
What do aspens wear to school? A tree-shirt.
What is the same shape and size as a sequoia tree, but weighs nothing at all? The tree’s shadow.
What has leaves, is green and a trunk? A houseplant heading on vacation.
So I cut down a tree using my vision today
It’s true, I SAW it with my own eyes.
Why are leaves always getting into risky business? They keep having to go out on a limb.
Is it hard to count conifers? It’s as simple as one, two, tree!
What did the rock say after it rolled into a tree? Nothing because rocks can’t talk.
Why are trees the best frenemies? They are great at throwing shade.
What did Betula pendula tell her little sister when she was annoyed? Leaf me alone, birch.
Why do trees always hold grudges? Because they never fir-get.
Don’t ask me for any tree puns.
Acacia haven’t noticed I’m all out.
To everyone in the Christmas Tree industry
You all do a great job! Stand up and take a bough!
If trees could kill you, they wood.
Why are cedars so hard to get along with? They suffer from bigo-tree and ex-tree-mism.
Why do trees always hate taking tests? Because they keep getting stumped by the questions.
What does a stick say when it falls down?
"Wood you help me up?"
What happened to the wooden car with a wooden engine and wheels? It wooden go at all.
Did you hear about the loggers who stopped cutting down the forest? The trees really felt re-leafed.
Why did the aspen date the poplar? She really found him to be in-tree-guing.
What is the trees favorite fruit? Pine-apple.
Why are trees such great thieves? They really have sticky fingers.
Why was the evergreen so lonely in high school? She was always pining to become a part of the poplar kids.
Why was the pine tree always in trouble? It kept being knotty.
I fernly beleaf my tree puns are qualitree, you can leaf me alone if you disagreen.
What was the worst crime in the tree kingdom? Tree-son.
What do you call a tree with no tinsel, baubles, or topping?
A tree.
What weighs more: a pound of logs or a pound of leaves? They weigh the same.
Did you hear about the bank that wanted to put an ATM up a tree? If it works, they are going to expand the idea to other branches.
How did the pines and firs end their war? With a tree-ty.
Can you tell me what type of weeping tree this is? Yes, but you willow me one later.
Today a large tree suddenly fell over right in front of me.
I was stumped.
What did the Jedi tell the sacred tree? May the forest be with you.
A woman who gave birth in a tree was sent to jail
She was charged with treeson
What do poplars bring to war? They bring their infan-tree.
Where do birch trees keep their jewelry? In the river bank.
What type of motorcycle do London Plane trees like to ride? Treeumph.