What do poplars bring to war? They bring their infan-tree.
How does a bee travel to a tree? They get on the buzz.
What is the trees favorite fruit? Pine-apple.
Where do birch trees keep their jewelry? In the river bank.
Why did the aspen date the poplar? She really found him to be in-tree-guing.
What types of plants do you get after you plant kisses? Tulips.
Why are trees so silly? All of their puns arboring and acorny.
So I cut down a tree using my vision today
It’s true, I SAW it with my own eyes.
Why are trees the best frenemies? They are great at throwing shade.
What did the Jedi tell the sacred tree? May the forest be with you.
Why aren’t trees competitive sports fans? They like to root for everyone.
Why do trees always hold grudges? Because they never fir-get.
Why are trees the largest plant? Because they are truly tree-mendous.
Why are leaves always getting into risky business? They keep having to go out on a limb.
What do pines eat for breakfast? Past-trees.
Is it hard to count conifers? It’s as simple as one, two, tree!
Did you hear the joke about the elephant who was stuck in a tree last spring? To get down, she had to sit down on a branch and wait until fall.
What does a triangle palm like to study in school? Trigonometree.
Why did the dunce get hurt after raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.
Why do trees make the worst enemies?
Because they are the best at throwing shade.
What did the beaver tell the tree? It has really been nice gnawing you.
What do trees drink at their parties? Root beer.
A woman who gave birth in a tree was sent to jail
She was charged with treeson
Today a large tree suddenly fell over right in front of me.
I was stumped.
Can you tell me what type of weeping tree this is? Yes, but you willow me one later.
What looks like half a pine tree? The other half.
Why was the tree doctor so good at his job? He could always get to the root of the problem.
What weighs more: a pound of logs or a pound of leaves? They weigh the same.
What do you give to a sick citrus tree to make it feel better? Lemon aid.
What did the rock say after it rolled into a tree? Nothing because rocks can’t talk.
Not many people liked the new tree I planted.
It wasn’t very poplar.
I fernly beleaf my tree puns are qualitree, you can leaf me alone if you disagreen.
Why are Christmas trees so clean? They know how to spruce things up.
Why do trees have to drink responsibly? Otherwise, they become a bunch of trunk idiots.
What did the eskimo say when he chopped down a tree?
Tim-brrr
What does the birch like to study in school? Chemistree.
What side of the tree contains the most leaves? The outside, of course.
If a tree had a mouth, wood it bark?
What happens to romantic trees on Valentine’s Day? They get all sappy.
Why do trees always get hired? They have the right qual-leaf-ications.
Why are trees such great drivers? They always take the shortest root.
What do you call a martial arts expert in a tree?
Bruce Leaf.
Why are trees a popular Christmas decoration? They look good in boughs.
Did you hear about the bank that wanted to put an ATM up a tree? If it works, they are going to expand the idea to other branches.
Getting my toy drone stuck in the tree isn’t the worst thing that happened to me today.
But it’s definitely up there.
Why couldn’t the oak tree make friends? All of the other trees thought that he was a bit shady.
What type of tree can be put inside your hand? A palm tree.
Did you hear about the big company that made syrup from contaminated trees? They maple their syrup from the shelves.
Why are trees so active in politics? They really like grass roots movements.
Why are dogwood trees amazing pets? They have a great bark and a wooden bite.