Is it hard to count conifers? It’s as simple as one, two, tree!
Why did the banana tree have to make a doctor’s appointment during the hurricane? Her fruit was peeling under the weather.
Why did the Sugar Maple have to go to the dentist? It really needed a root canal.
What is it called when a tree stabs his friend in the back?
A be-tree-yal
Why are trees such great drivers? They always take the shortest root.
Why are Christmas trees so clean? They know how to spruce things up.
My friend has just won the tallest Christmas tree competition
I thought to myself, 'How can you top that?
What type of motorcycle do London Plane trees like to ride? Treeumph.
I told my friend a tree pun.
He was stumped.
Why are trees a popular Christmas decoration? They look good in boughs.
When is a piece of wood made king? when its a ruler
Why aren’t trees competitive sports fans? They like to root for everyone.
Did you hear about the loggers who stopped cutting down the forest? The trees really felt re-leafed.
How do trees get onto the internet? They just log on.
What did the tree say after someone hit it? We should really call the copse.
If a tree had a mouth, wood it bark?
Why do trees always walk so slowly? All they can do is lumber around.
Why do trees like to watch Star Trek? They really relate to the Captain’s log.
Where do saplings graduate from? Elementree school.
What is the hardest part about being a tree? You have so many limbs, but you still can’t walk.
Why are trees the best frenemies? They are great at throwing shade.
What types of books do pines read? Poetree books.
How do you get down from a tree? You can’t because down comes from ducks.
Why was the tree doctor so good at his job? He could always get to the root of the problem.
What did the nut tree say when his wife left him? I walnut stand for this!
What is a birch’s favorite dinosaur? The Tree
Rex.
What did Betula pendula tell her little sister when she was annoyed? Leaf me alone, birch.
What tree makes fruit that tastes a lot like chicken? Poultree.
What is the trees favorite fruit? Pine-apple.
What is a tree’s favorite geometry shape? The treeangle.
Why were the spruces in a group of three? They like to travel as a tree-o.
Don’t ask me for any tree puns.
Acacia haven’t noticed I’m all out.
What did the tree say when it fell down?
"Call pine one one!"
Why are leaves always getting into risky business? They keep having to go out on a limb.
What do you call a nice tree that does not have any teeth? Sweetgums.
Why are trees the largest plant? Because they are truly tree-mendous.
Where do American trees like to go for vacations in Canada? Montreeal.
Did you hear the joke about the elephant who was stuck in a tree last spring? To get down, she had to sit down on a branch and wait until fall.
What is it called when a tree has back problems?
ScoliOAKsis
What did the tree tell the drill? You bore me.
Where did the Adansonia tree go to get a quick trim? To the baobarber.
Why did the sapling go to the doctor’s office? He was feeling a little green.
Getting my toy drone stuck in the tree isn’t the worst thing that happened to me today.
But it’s definitely up there.
What do you give to a sick citrus tree to make it feel better? Lemon aid.
Why are trees such great thieves? They really have sticky fingers.
Why are trees so silly? All of their puns arboring and acorny.
Why was the pine tree always in trouble? It kept being knotty.
How do you describe an acorn in one sentence? In a nutshell, it is an oak tree.
What do trees write on? Loose leaf paper.
Why was the tree so embarrassed during the winter? After her leaves fell, she felt naked.