If a tree had a mouth, wood it bark?
Not many people liked the new tree I planted.
It wasn’t very poplar.
What does a triangle palm like to study in school? Trigonometree.
Why don’t trees travel in groups? Because two’s a company, but tree’s a crowd.
Why aren’t trees competitive sports fans? They like to root for everyone.
Why did the banana tree have to make a doctor’s appointment during the hurricane? Her fruit was peeling under the weather.
What type of tree can be put inside your hand? A palm tree.
What did the tree say when it fell down?
"Call pine one one!"
What is the trees favorite fruit? Pine-apple.
What do aspens wear to school? A tree-shirt.
What does a stick say when it falls down?
"Wood you help me up?"
Getting my toy drone stuck in the tree isn’t the worst thing that happened to me today.
But it’s definitely up there.
How do you describe an acorn in one sentence? In a nutshell, it is an oak tree.
Why do trees always hate taking tests? Because they keep getting stumped by the questions.
So I cut down a tree using my vision today
It’s true, I SAW it with my own eyes.
What is bigger than a Christmas tree?
A Christmas four
How does a bee travel to a tree? They get on the buzz.
What did the tree tell the drill? You bore me.
Which tree is more annoying, pine or oak?
Pine. Because pine needles while oak leaves.
What did the conifer say when he finally got alone with his crush? It’s just yew and me, baby.
Why are trees so active in politics? They really like grass roots movements.
Why are trees the largest plant? Because they are truly tree-mendous.
Why are trees the best frenemies? They are great at throwing shade.
What is the tree’s least favorite month of the year? SepTIMBERRRR.
What did the eskimo say when he chopped down a tree?
Tim-brrr
Why are dogwood trees amazing pets? They have a great bark and a wooden bite.
Why are trees a popular Christmas decoration? They look good in boughs.
Why did the sapling jump in the ocean? He wanted to swim with the manatrees.
I told my friend a tree pun.
He was stumped.
When is a piece of wood made king? when its a ruler
How did the pines and firs end their war? With a tree-ty.
What is the hardest part about being a tree? You have so many limbs, but you still can’t walk.
Why are trees such great drivers? They always take the shortest root.
Is it hard to count conifers? It’s as simple as one, two, tree!
What did the Christmas tree tell his crush? I pine for you.
Why do trees have to drink responsibly? Otherwise, they become a bunch of trunk idiots.
What types of plants do you get after you plant kisses? Tulips.
What is a tree’s favorite geometry shape? The treeangle.
If trees could kill you, they wood.
What types of books do pines read? Poetree books.
How the tree introduce themselves to the dentist?
“Implant”
What tree makes fruit that tastes a lot like chicken? Poultree.
Finally put up the Christmas tree...
It really spruced up the room.
Why did the Platanus occidentalis have to go to the doctor more than the other trees? Because it was always sycamore.
What is the same shape and size as a sequoia tree, but weighs nothing at all? The tree’s shadow.
What weighs more: a pound of logs or a pound of leaves? They weigh the same.
What has leaves, is green and a trunk? A houseplant heading on vacation.
What do poplars bring to war? They bring their infan-tree.
What is it called when a tree has back problems?
ScoliOAKsis
What do you see when an elephant hides behind a tree?
The trunks