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Literally Jokes

April Fools Jokes
Babies born March 31st are the easiest to prank on April Fool’s
They were literally born yesterday.
Meat Puns
I met a girl in a vegetarian restaurant who said she recognized me, but I have literally never seen herbivore.
Tiger Puns
It’s really annoying being stuck behind a flamingo in a car. They literally never put their foot down.
Parrot Puns
My uncles petshop really started doing well when he started selling parrots. They literally flew off the shelves.
Space Puns
Cassini spacecraft took pictures of both Saturn and Earth. It was literally the best of both worlds.
He knew literally everything about the constellations. Some might even say that his knowledge of the night sky was astronomical.
Have you heard about the chef on space station? He’s not that much of an astronaut, but his food is literally out of this world!
Why people did not like the restaurant on? Because there was literally no atmosphere.
Plant Puns
Next time you’re feeling down, just remember: your plants are rooting for you. Literally!
Crocodile Puns
Why should you never ever play texas hold'em with a crocodile?
You will literally lose every hand.
Flamingo Puns
It’s really annoying being stuck behind a flamingo in a car. They literally never put their foot down.
One Liners and Short Jokes
My wife gets mad at me because I always take things literally.
The police get mad at me because that’s apparently considered “kleptomania.”
Pun Puns
Why do thieves have a hard time understanding puns?
Because they take things literally!
Wifi Puns
My Wifi password is "writtenontherouter"

And I let all my guests walk to the router and let them unsuccessfully try to use the initial password until I tell them it's literally "writtenontherouter".
Gorilla Puns
What is just as big as a gorilla but literally weighs nothing?
A gorilla's shadow.