What flowering plant is an amazing equestrian? The horse chestnut.
What do chic evergreens wear for cruelty-free fashion? Faux fir.
What are the best mushrooms to have with a jacket potato? Button mushrooms!
What do you call a human that's now a cactus?
A transplant.
There is always a first time to everything. For instance, when you take a mushroom either for lunch or dinner, you will be amazed at how magical it is.
What type of car did the mushroom drive by in? A spores car.
Can you tell me what type of weeping tree this is? Yes, but you willow me one later.
What did the tree tell the drill? You bore me.
What tree makes fruit that tastes a lot like chicken? Poultree.
My friend has just won the tallest Christmas tree competition
I thought to myself, 'How can you top that?
Did you hear about the bank that wanted to put an ATM up a tree? If it works, they are going to expand the idea to other branches.
Why can’t a Christmas tree sew? It keeps dropping its needles.
Did you hear about the lazy flower who finally got his act together?
He just needed a kick in the bud.
Who did Prince Mushroom fall in love with at the royal ball? - Chanterella!
What type of room do you eat? A mush room.
Next time you’re feeling down, just remember: your plants are rooting for you. Literally!
You can virtually stay in any room. The only one you can’t is the mush-room because it is reserved for fungi.
What do aspens wear to school? A tree-shirt.
A chemist plants a seed.
He takes good care of it every day. He waters it and fertilizes the soil around it. As it becomes a big and healthy tree, the chemist thinks to himself: What a good chemist-tree.
How did the pines and firs end their war? With a tree-ty.
Did you hear about the flower who joined Tinder?
He just wants somebudy to love.
Why was the tree so embarrassed during the winter? After her leaves fell, she felt naked.
What is the trees favorite fruit? Pine-apple.
Finally put up the Christmas tree...
It really spruced up the room.
Never go on a date with a cactus
They'll spike your drink
What do pines eat for breakfast? Past-trees.
How do you know you’re in love with a flower?
Not a daisy goes by where you don’t think of them.
Why do trees like to watch Star Trek? They really relate to the Captain’s log.
How many lips does a flower have?
Tulips.
How do you know if there’s a snowman in your bed?
You wake up wet!
What do you call a snowman party?
A snowball.
What do you call a gangsta snowman?
Froze-T.
The only way the mushroom could think of decorating his house was with toadstools.
What do you call a snowman on rollerblades?
A snowmobile.
I always invite the mushroom to my party because he is such a fun-guy.
How do two flowers greet each other?
Hey bud, how’s it growing?
What did the Christmas tree tell his crush? I pine for you.
Why do trees have to drink responsibly? Otherwise, they become a bunch of trunk idiots.
What plant do both Spaniards and French agree is the best?
Seaweed.
How does a bee travel to a tree? They get on the buzz.
What is it called when a tree stabs his friend in the back?
A be-tree-yal
What do you call flowers who are bffs?
Buds.
What type of motorcycle do London Plane trees like to ride? Treeumph.
How one snowman greets the other one?
Ice to meet you.
Why do flowers always drive so fast?
They put the petal to the metal.
What did the mushroom’s sing when they won the closed-cup? - We are the champignons!
How do you know flowers are capable of kissing?
They have tulips.
During the contribution’s session, the mushroom family never gave a lot. They were just two spore.
What do Snowmen call their offspring?
Chill-dren.
What did the teacher say when he sent the naughty student out of the (mush)room? - You’re in big truffle young man!