Why did the music teacher need a ladder? To reach the high notes.
Which composer likes tea the most?
Chai-kovsky.
What do you call a cow that plays the saxophone? A blues moo-sician.
What's an owl's favorite rock band?
The Who
What does Eric Clapton and a cup of coffee have in common? They both suck without Cream.
A drummer got a tattoo of a drum kit on himself
It was very cymbalic.
My band only plays dog whistles.
You've probably never heard us.
What did the drum say about his childhood?
Those were the cymbaler days.
My grandpa left me a violin and an oil painting in his will.
When I took them to be valued, I was told that they were by Van Gogh and Stradivarius. Sadly they were worthless as Van Gogh was rubbish at making violins and Stradivarius was an awful painter.
Drums - You can't beat 'em. Well, you have to, really.
After playing guitar for years I thought I could learn to play the piano.
But it's not an easy instrument to pick up.
What was stolen from the music store? The lute.
Why did the pianist turn around on his way to the grocery store?
He forgot his Chopin Liszt.
My uncle was crushed by a piano...
His funeral was very low key.
Why was the square dance fiddler arrested for smuggling?
Because of his contra band...
After playing guitar for years I thought I could learn to play the piano.
But it's not an easy instrument to pick up.
What is Beethoven doing now?
De-composing.
Did you hear about the crook who was stealing guitars from classic rock stars?
He was just arrested for Petty theft.
What’s the difference between a violin and a fiddle?
One has strings and the other has strangs.
I told the person who was playing my trumpet,
To stop pushing my buttons.
What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on?
He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it.
What’s a golf clubs favorite type of music?
Swing.
What's better than having roses on your piano?
Tulips on your organ....
What chord does jesus play on guitar?
Gsus
My printer just told me it was joining a band.
Makes sense since it lives to jam.
What does a trumpet and a baseball have in common? People cheer when you hit them with a bat.
My son told me, “The car manual says that I shouldn’t turn up the stereo to full volume.”
I said, “That’s sound advice.”
What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?
You can tune a guitar but you can't "tuna" fish!
I used to play triangle in a reggae band but I had to give it up. It was just one ting after another.
The ad said "Free Violin", but there were strings attached...
What do you call a communist violin?
The second Fidel.
Why do blues musicians tour the most in the summer? So they can visit all their kids.
What did the man do when he dropped his violin?
He quartet...
I found this amazing bluegrass band that does covers of 80s rock.
They call themselves Ban Jovi.
The only difference between a band teacher and a banned teacher
is what they were bangin
What did Beethoven say to Johann Sebastian when he was helping him parallel park?
“Bach it up.”
Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?” The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”
What did the band Boston say in praise of the Sistine Chapel?
"It's more than a ceiling"
What do you call a group of orcas that play music?
An iPod.
I don't usually brag about my drum jokes but um...
tss
Why do saxophone players get so many dates?
Because they have sax appeal
What do you call a berry that plays the trumpet? A tooty fruity!
What do you call a pianist who throws trash everywhere?
Litterachi.
How do you keep your violin from being stolen?
Put it in a viola case.
I was supposed to play the trumpet
But I blew it.
I had a job repairing 17th century violins...
I only fixed instruments that were BAROQUE.
Which band were way ahead of their time in the stage lighting department?
LED Zeppelin.
The fisherman was playing his out-of-tune guitar.
Luckily he caught a Tuna
What do you call a owl dance party that only plays folk music?
A hootenanny.
What kind of music do mummies listen to?
Wrap music.