Want to start a Hula band that covers music by Poison.
Gonna call it Poi, Son.
A drum rolled down a hill.
Ba-dum tsssh!
The best gift I ever got was a broken drum...
You can't beat it.
What do you call a police officer who plays the drums?
A beat cop.
I'm starting a music group that performs Classical Greek music.
I'm calling it Oedipal Arrangements.
What's better than having roses on your piano?
Tulips on your organ....
What does Eric Clapton and a cup of coffee have in common? They both suck without Cream.
Follow Beethoven's example. People said he was never going to be a musician because he was deaf. Did he listen to them? Of course not.
We caught the drummer of our band masturbating over his drum kit...
I guess the pervert thinks of them as s*x cymbals.
I found this amazing bluegrass band that does covers of 80s rock.
They call themselves Ban Jovi.
I've removed all the black keys from my piano
Hopefully I'll C Major improvement!
Remember the band that did that rock cover of “walk like an Egyptian’ by The Bangles?
Pharaohsmith.
Why can't a Platypus be trusted on the radio?
Because they all have fowl mouths.
What do you call a group of killer whales carrying musical instruments.
An orca-stra.
What do you call a group of orcas that play music?
An iPod.
Why do blues musicians tour the most in the summer? So they can visit all their kids.
After playing guitar for years I thought I could learn to play the piano.
But it's not an easy instrument to pick up.
What genre are national anthems?
Country.
What do you call an 80s synth pop band with a scoop of ice cream? Depeche a la Mode.
When did the pianist finally turn their life around?
After they hit Rockbottomoff.
What's brown, lumpy, and sits on a piano bench?
Beethoven's Last Movement
The worst pub I’ve ever been in was called The Fiddle.
It was a vile inn.
What is a garbage disposal’s favorite music group?
NSYNC.
What instrument do English people play?
The Anglo-Saxophone!
My band only plays dog whistles.
You've probably never heard us.
I slapped my violin out of anger, then I got arrested for domestic violins.
What do you call the worlds smallest violin?
Hard to play.
What should you do if you can't afford a fancy trumpet?
Buy a frugelhorn
I had a job repairing 17th century violins...
I only fixed instruments that were BAROQUE.
What does a trumpet and a baseball have in common? People cheer when you hit them with a bat.
There was a fish who wanted to be a broadcaster...
Until he went on air.
How many second violinists does it take to change a light bulb?
None. They can’t get up that high.
I used to be the triangle player in a Jamaican band but I had to quit....
It was always just one ting after another.
C, E-flat, and G walk into a bar.
The bartender says: "Hold it! We don't serve minors here."
What's the difference between a guitar and a fish?
You can tune a guitar but you can't "tuna" fish!
All my neighbours bought the same set of stereos...
When will they stop stereotyping?
My neighbors are listening to great music.
Whether they like it or not.
Did you know Rolf Harris was a talented violinist as a child?
Yeah, he was a mean kiddie fiddler.
What is the musical part of a snake?
The scales.
What do you do to a female news anchor who breaks a leg?
You put her in a broadcast.
I wrote a song about a tortilla. Well actually, it’s more of a wrap.
I heard Placebo on the radio. I actually thought it was The Cure.
I made a fiddle from a squash yesterday...
... i think it's broken, it only plays gourd vibrations.
What kind of music should you listen to while fishing?
Something catchy.
People don't believe me when I tell them I'm the lead singer in a Black Eyed Peas tribute band....
Well I am.
I had to borrow my friend’s trumpet because I sounded too good on my own, and people would be jealous!
I didn’t want to toot my own horn.
Why was Mozart a child prodigy?
All his early pieces were in A sharp minor.
What did Prince leave on the neck of his guitar?
Finger prince.
What concert costs $0.45?
50 Cent with Nickelback.
Which element is a member of famous rock band?
Hg