Although knights were considered protectors of the realm, they sometimes did get involved in the politics of their time. This was because the knights followed knight-wing politics.
How do Medieval sheep protest prisons?
They storm the baaaastille.
Romeo & Juliet.doc...
...is a play on Word.
Unlike fairy tales, the stories of Egyptian mummies always goes from riches to rags.
There was this knight who would be always roasting whatever he would catch for food. Guess this is why he was known as the Bonfire Knight.
The mummy caught a really bad cold. He cannot stop coffin.
How was the Roman Empire cut in half?
With a pair of Caesars.
When a ship or Vikings suddenly vanishes
There's a disturbance in the Norse
My Gladiator DVD stopped working...
Talk about an *epic* fail.
Q: What do you get when you cross an Egyptian pharaoh with a mechanic?
A: Toot and Car Man.
Why did the Vikings sail to England in longboats?
It was too far to swim!
Hey, have you heard about....
A gladiator whose arms and legs been cut off in a fight? Well, I heard that he's been disarmed and defeated.
In medieval times, what were people who worked in banks known as? They were known as fortune-tellers!
The only kind of Rock music that the Pilgrims were fond of was Plymouth Rock.
England is the wettest country because many monarchs reigned there for many years.
How did kids in Ancient Rome get their hair cut?
With little Caesar's.
Vikings aren't afraid of death.
They know they'll be Bjorn again.
What did the bone mage use to rob medieval homes?
A skeleton key
When indoor toilets were introduced in Britain, it was considered to be a revo-loo-tionary move.
Q: What game show did pharaohs like the most?
A: The $20,000 pyramid.
She broke up with me while we were swimming in Egypt
I'm still in de-Nile
In the medieval ages, chess was a very popular game among Kings and Queens. This was because they had castles in it!
Why did the Viking buy an old boat?
He couldn't a fjord a new one.
I like my wine like I like my medieval cities.
Fortified.
I heard people are trying to ban roman numerals.
Not on my watch.
How did they name those guys who wore shiny armor in medieval times?
They couldn't think of a name, so they decided to call it a knight.
What was the Romans' greatest achievement?
Learning to speak Latin!
What did ancient Egyptian pharaohs sleep on?...
...Temple-pedic mattresses...
Who succeeded the first President of the United States?
The second one.
No one could measure their height in medieval kingdoms.
Only the Ruler could.
Napoleon conquered too much lang because he had too little Toulouse.
The Second World War was very slow because they were Stalin.
What do you call a medieval spearman who is self employed?
A freelancer.
Just landed in Rome, Italy. My pilot used to be a Franciscan Monk...
...But now he's an Air Friar.
When the student had asked the History teacher what questions will be there for the History exam, she answered, "The Past."
What do you call a depressed tick from ancient Rome?
A hopeless Roman Tick
If I lived in medieval times, I'd be a tavern guard.
I've always been known for my Inn-Security.
Where do southern Viking descendants go after death?
Y'allhalla.
What does vikings call english villages?
Chopping centers.
A sperm donor, a carpenter, and julius ceaser walk into a bar
He came, he saw, he conquered
Vikings joke
Why do West Virginia residences love the Vikings?
They catch theilens from their cousins.
What time is it Julius? 8:02 Brutus.
Ancient Rome
Two friends are talking:
- you know how many girls I had?
- mmm?
- No, not that many...
During the Great Depression, President Hoover didn't give a dam.
Why did the Archaeopteryx always catch the worm?
Because it was an early bird!
For the last two weeks my kids have been building a medieval blanket fort every evening to sleep in. Many nights they also stayed up past their bedtime playing fortnight under its protective cover.
It was a night knight fort for Fortnight for a fortnight.
Why did the Pilgrims sail to America?
It was too far to swim.
What do you call 3 knights in a relationship?
Polyarmory
It was quite dangerous for messengers back in the medieval era.
They often had to wear mail armor.
What did Richard III say when someone asked to build a car park in Leicester?
"Over my dead body!"