Tractor Jokes

"I bought an ant farm. I don't know where I am going to get a tractor that small!"
- Steven Wright
How do you get a farm girl to marry you?
First, a tractor.
What did the farmer say after he lost his tractor?
โ€œWhereโ€™s my tractor?โ€
The Texas Farmer There was once a very successful farmer from Texas who started gaining interest in his ancestry. After doing some digging, he traced his lineage back to a small town in Ireland. And lo and behold, they were a family of farmers. So he packed his bags and took a trip to Ireland to visit the small town to see if he could track down some of his kin. After landing in Dublin, and driving an hour outside of the city, he stopped in a pub to grab a drink and start asking around about his family. The Texan sat down, ordered a pint, and started talking to the Irishman sitting at the bar. After explaining his story and the purpose of the trip, the Irishman responded, โ€œYou donโ€™t say! Iโ€™ve never heard of your family, but Iโ€™m a farmer as well. Tell me, whatโ€™s it like farming in Texas?โ€ โ€œGladly,โ€ the Texan said, โ€œfarming in Texas has been quite lucrative for me. If you started out in the morning, and drove west, you could drive all day before you reached the end of my property. And if you started the next day and drove East all day, you wouldnโ€™t reach the end of my property. Same thing North and South, you could drive either direction all day and you wouldnโ€™t reach the end of my farmland.โ€ โ€œAhh, I know what you mean,โ€ said the Irishman, โ€œIโ€™ve got a tractor like that as well.โ€
A magic tractor drove down the road and turned into a field!
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