There was a young fellow named Hall, who died in the spring in the fall. 'Twould have been a bad thing, had he died in the spring, but he didn't — he died in the fall.
I need a front door for my hall, The replacement I bought was too tall. So I hacked it and chopped it, And carefully lopped it, And now the dumb thing is too small.
I remember when I was small and cool, I was always playing truant from school. My mum used to say, "You'll regret it one day When you grow up to become a fool."
Now I'm old; the damage is done. How I wish I'd listened to Mum. If I could turn back time, I'd study hard and toe the line Instead of acting foolish and dumb.
Now let that be a lesson to one and all That life is more than just having a ball. It was great having fun When I was young, But I wish I'd spent more time in the school hall.
(By John P. Read )
The Famous Grandfather
A trio of old veterans were bragging and jokes about the heroic exploits of their ancestors one afternoon down at the VFW hall.
"My great grandfather, at age 13," one declared proudly, "was a drummer boy at Shiloh."
"Mine," boasts another, "went down with Custer at the Battle of Little Big Horn."
"I'm the only soldier in my family," confessed vet number three, "but if my great grandfather was living today he'd be the most famous man in the world." "Really?
What'd he do?" his friends wanted to know.
But he would be 165 years old."