Diseases Jokes

The Toughest Time of My Life I had the toughest time of my life. First, I got angina pectoris and then arteriosclerosis. Just as I was recovering from these, I got tuberculosis, double pneumonia and phthisis, then they gave me hypodermics. Appendicitis was followed by tonsillectomy. These gave way to aphasia and hypertrophic cirrhosis. I completely lost my memory for a while. I know I had diabetes and acute ingestion, besides gastritis, rheumatism, lumbago and neuritis... I don't know how I pulled through it all. It was the hardest spelling test I've ever had!
I'm a supervillain from Italy, I have the power to infect people with deadly diseases.
It’s-a-me, Malario.
The Creative Diseases A man and woman were about to "get it on". After meeting at a party earlier that night. He starts to take his shoes and socks off when she cries out, "Oh wow, what happened to your feet??" He replies, "Oh that. I had Tolio." "You mean polio don't you?" "No. It just infected my toes." Thinking nothing of it he begins taking off his pants. "Oh my, what happened to your knee caps?" She asks. "Oh that. It's nothing. I once had Kneasles." "Don't you mean measles?" She asks. "No. The disease only attacked my knees, therefore it's called kneasles" He begins to take off his shorts, she takes a quick look, and can't help but blurt out: "Let me guess, Smallcox?"
Several epidemics throughout history have many similarities in characteristics.
For example, many diseases evolved from poor hygiene between animals and humans and a rise in urban population and interregional communication. Many had very similar effects and modes of transmission.

Because of the similarities, many historians are looking into allegations of these diseases stealing each other's methods, committing plague-iarism.
Strawberries are berry healthy. They pack a punch when it comes to beating cancer and other diseases.
Hey baby, you got any diseases? Want some?
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