I’m no vampire but I’m fine with getting no sleep and biting your neck all night.
I've taken up online yoga since the COVID-19 outbreak started.
It helps me namaste at home.
What did the Indian boy say to his parent before going into self isolation?
Mumbai.
I sneezed in the bank today, it was the most attention I have received in the last 10 years.
Woke up with sweats afraid I'd contracted the corona virus...
Changed into jeans and was all good.
Why is there no COVID cases in Antarctica
Because it’s so ice-o-lated
With Coronavirus and our impending doom, I guess no one really had 2020 vision after all.
Who is running the corona virus relief?
WHO??
Is it true what they say about the size of a man’s canine teeth?
Girl, are you the Wuhan Corona Virus?
Because you’re taking my breath away.
Hey, my parents are out of town. That means we have the haunted mansion all to ourselves.
I would totally carve your pumpkin.
Why are people buying so much toilet paper because of the corona virus?
Because when one person sneezes, 100 people shit themselves.
People with 20-20 vision..
Why you didn't warn us before??
I may be dressed as a vampire tonihgt, but if you play your cards right you might be the one sucking
Hey Baby, wanna find out why they call me Pumpkin-Head?
Nice pumpkins!
Why did the vampire get a COVID test?
Because he was COFFIN.
I just asked the wife to get into her nurse's uniform.
She said "Why? Are you feeling horny?"
"No we need bread!"
What does a person with Covid like to drink?
Coughy.
What do you get when a raven flies into a group of 18 crows?
Corvid-19.
Dad jokes are like Corona.
Everybody gets It but not everyone can laugh about It.
I am a mean green machine.
I know I've never been all that attractive.
But lately every woman I try to approach avoids me like the plague.
If Corona virus is just a beer virus..
Then it’s just a yeast infection!
The government announced that because of COVID, we can have gatherings of up to 5 people without issues.
Where the hell am I going to find 5 people without issues?
Corona virus is just like pasta.
The Chinese invented it but the Italians will spread it all over the world.
I got really good at telling them, so I’m being crowned the king of corona virus puns.
You’re all formally invited to attend my coronation.
I really hope corona virus can't spread through s*x
It would be so lonely being the last man on Earth.
Due to covid most exotic dancers have been furloughed.
Basically, they’ve been stripped of their source of income.
Why can't corona virus jokes go viral?
Because people are laughing into their elbows.
Did you know there are 206 bones in the human body? Would you mind one more?
The amount of bad Covid-19 jokes being circulated is starting to reach alarming figures
Some scientists suspect that it might be a pundemic.
What do Saturday and Sunday have in common with the corona virus?
The weakend.
Which Pokémon has Covid?
Pik-achoo.
You should dress up as a baker for Halloween with that set of buns.
Me: I'll have a Corona please.
Waiter: *Cough*
Me: Thank you.
We are 11 days into self-isolation ands it is really upsetting me to witness my wife standing at the living room window gazing aimlessly into space with tears running down her cheeks.
Don’t get me wrong, I empathize with her. I’ve considered letting her in many times, but rules are rules.
I'm tired of this old broom. Got anything else I can ride?
I want a taste of your Milky Way.
Flat earthers fear 6 feet social distancing could push some people over the edge.
You know why women's eyes are so noticeable these days?
It's the mask era.
Just saw a burglar kicking his own door in.
I asked: “What are you doing?”
“Working from home.”
What do Muslims do during the coronavirus outbreak?
They stay in Quran-tine.
John Travolta has been diagnosed with the Corona Virus.
He had chills that were multiplying.
There’s no trick in these pants.
Hi, I'm a zombie, can I eat you?
As the local drunk, I'm quite worried about the corona virus.
It's got potential tequila lot of people.
I like my girls how I like my Covid.
19 and easily spread.
Call me a pirate and give me that booty.