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Here's Why Men Don't Listen to Women

It should come as no surprise that men and women are fundamentally different, and one of the differences that stands out the most between the sexes is the way in which they tend to communicate. This is why you'll often find many women complaining that the men in their lives just don't know how to listen. In order to be able to better understand why this happens, let's take a good look at the 10 biggest reasons why men don't always appear to listen: 


1. Men Don't Understand Women's Needs
Why Men Don't Listen

Women often tend to speak using emotionally-driven language that men find it hard to decipher. Men tend to be more straightforward and practical when they need something, while women tend to express their needs through how they're feeling at the time, since they tend to be more acutely aware of their surroundings.

John Gray, author of ' Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus,' says that “when a man can listen to a woman’s feelings without getting angry and frustrated, he gives her a wonderful gift. He makes it safe for her to express herself. The more she is able to express herself, the more she feels heard and understood, and the more she is able to give a man the loving trust, acceptance, appreciation, admiration, approval, and encouragement that he needs.”

2. Men Can't Handle the Baggage

The art of conversation requires as much understanding as it does listening. Since men are genetically wired differently to women, they might often feel that emotionally-driven conversations are dumping an additional heavy load onto their shoulders that they're not quite sure how to deal with. If men can't come up with an immediate fix to a given problem, then it may cause them to become frustrated or stressed, which is why some men tend to zone out of such conversations.

3. Women Need to Be Agreed With
Why Men Don't Listen

Most women are involved with a thousand different things on a daily basis. They can simultaneously be mothers, daughters, wives, employees, and business owners, to name just a few. Sometimes all that they want is acknowledgement for the tireless work that they're constantly doing. Men, on the other hand, tend to want to forget their troubles after a long day, so bringing up heavily-loaded conversation topics at such times might often lead to trouble.

4. Women Don't Want Men to Fix Them

Men instinctively like to repair things, so when a woman presents a problem that she doesn't want fixed, it can tend to confuse most males. Men just want the women in their lives to be happy, and discussing unfixable problems aren't usually perceived as being helpful for anything. If something can't be fixed, then men feel it would be better to focus on something that can be.

5. Men Might Have Something Else on Their Mind

Generally speaking, men aren't incredible multi-taskers, and usually tend to focus with laser-like precision on one issue at a time. That's why when a woman brings up a new topic while a man is already preoccuppied with something else, the response might not be quite what they were expecting. This is no reason to be alarmed though, as they'll be back to their normal selves as soon as they've got their primary concern out of the way.


6. Emotions Can Make Men Uncomfortable

When talking about men, John Gray says that "love brings up our unresolved feelings. One day we are feeling loved, and the next day we are suddenly afraid to trust love. The painful memories of being rejected begin to surface when we are faced with trusting and accepting our partner’s love.” This seemingly innate fear of love and other powerful emotions certainly isn't shared by women, so that's another reason why communication between the sexes tends to suffer.

7. Men Dislike Being Interrupted
Why Men Don't Listen

Let's face it, many women can easily outtalk a man. When a woman asks for a man's opinion, and then doesn't agree with his honest answer, she may immediately take over the conversation again, without allowing the man to give a complete explanation. If men and women could both agree to listen without interrupting, then life would be a lot easier for everyone involved.

8. Men Can't Converse Properly From Another Room

Since women are far better multi-taskers than men, it makes sense that they'd be able to hold a conversation with someone who's in a different room. Men, on the other hand, find such conversations far more challenging. Without any obvious visual prompts to look out for, the meaning of the conversation could be easily lost. In order to have a meaningful conversation with a man, it's best to wait until he's right in front of you.

9. Most Men Hate Gossip

Most men couldn't care less about what goes in the celebrity world. Neither do they care about what you colleagues got up to at the office Christmas party! What he does want to hear about though, is what your dreams are, what you're going to do with your time together, and basically anything that has to do with their immediate world.

10. Women Are Often All Over the Place

When dealing with a lot of stress, women tend to rapidly bounce from one subject to another. As a result, men often end up baffled, trying to work out how each topic connects to the others, even if they're not meant to. In short, it would be far more constructive for women to talk about one topic at a time, making their conversations with men a great deal more fruitful.


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