Many people seem to believe that warm water droplets get cooled fast and form fog. It's a mist-conception. Someone should de-mist-ify it.
What do books wear on a wet and rainy day? Rain quotes.
Q: What do you call a weatherman who farts while he pees?
A. Rain with a little wind and thunder.
When is it raining money? Whenever there's 'change' in the weather.
How could the skeleton tell that rain was coming?
He could feel it in his bones.
Why did the cloud stay at home? It was feeling under the weather.
What did the vegan wear to the beach?
A zucchini!
Thunderstorms are shrewd investors. They put their money in a combination of frozen and liquid assets.
What is the difference between a wet day and a lion with a toothache? A wet day is pouring with rain, the other is roaring with pain.
Why do skeletons hate how wind feels? Because it goes right through them!
What did one raindrop say to the other? Two's company, three's a cloud.
A little boy asks his dad, “Why is it raining? Is the sky sad?”
The dad replies, “Yes, son, the sky is pretty blue.”
Four types of weather were having a race. Sunny won gold, cloudy got silver, snowy picked up a bronze, and rainy won a precipitation award.
Many people think that when warm droplets of water in the air are rapidly cooled it forms fog.
But it’s actually a common mist-conception.
My glasses may be fogged up, but don’t worry I’ll be fine.
I’m optimistic!
What is an evil dictator’s favorite type of weather?
A rain of terror.
What did the rainwater say as it ran off the road.
Grate.
There was news of a snowstorm. It arrived white on time.
Q: What did the wind turbine say to the engineer after he fixed him?
A: I’m a big fan of your work!
I'm trying to think of a weather pun, but my mind's kinda cloudy now.
Knock Knock
Who's there?
Accordion
Accordion who?
Accordion to the forecast, it's going to rain tonight.
It was pretty foggy outside today.
I shot an arrow in the air, and it stuck.
I guess you could say that things hit by tornado's are blown up.
With the kind of weather, it was almost certain that the bride-to-be would get a hoarse throat as she walked through the rain into her bridal shower.
A man once said when is Monday coming? His wife said Mon-soon.
Q: What did the cloud say to the lightning bolt?
A: You're shocking!
The winter is the worst time of year for a wedding. The grooms always seem to be getting cold feet.
Q: What do you call a gust of wind that blows a tall guys onto a basketball court?
A: The NBA draft
I was just telling my friend Michael Rains about my unfortunate allergy to my home-grown barley.
My grains give me migraines, Mike Rains.
Where does fog go to the bathroom?
Anywhere it wants.
The best place meteorologists can stop to get a drink on their way home is the isobar.
Q: What falls but never hits the ground?
A: The temperature
When can 3 elephants stand under 1 umbrella and not get wet?
When it’s not raining.
Sorry for raining on your parade, I really thought it'd be snow problem.
A bunch of chill-dren from the neighborhood played all afternoon in the snow.
You can't blame anyone if you fall in your driveway due to snowy weather...
Because that's your own asphalt.
Yesterday’s weather forecast predicted freezing rain. However, it turned out to be quite an ice day.
What did fog do to make the captain angry? He mist the boat.
I over boiled some venison broth earlier.
It was deerly mist.
What’s a bigamist?
It’s what Italians call a thick fog.
Even during thunderstorms, Santa can still deliver presents because raindeers fly his sleigh.
Q: What is the opposite of a cold front?
A: A warm back
Q: What do you call a freezing bird?
A: Brrrrrrrrrdddd
What happened when it started raining coins?
It knocked some sense (cents) into the world.
What happens before it rains candy? It sprinkles.
Nowadays, people drought the accuracy of weather men because the climatic patterns are so unpredictable.
We got the news of a coming flood today. The news was leaked.
Does all this rain make you want an ark?
I Noah guy.
There was a television channel ran by pets, the weather forecast was on and inclement weather was being predicted...
High chance of it raining cats and dogs, howling winds, and a possible purricane.
How does one raindrop ask another out? Water you doing tonight?