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Suck Jokes

Panda Puns
Why did the panda’s joke suck?
It was unbearable.
Trumpet Puns
If you suck playing the trumpet, that's probably why.
Music Puns
What does Eric Clapton and a cup of coffee have in common? They both suck without Cream.
Monster Puns
A vampire can't be a comedian. They just aren't funny, and worst of all they always know they suck.
What do bats say to vampires?
“You suck!”
Coffee Puns
What’s the difference between a Starbucks latte and a whore?
Nothing, they both suck and empty your wallet!
Funny Haiku
I think haikus suck.
Has to be five seven five.
Who came up with this?
Quotes
“Thank you, 2:30 in the morning, for always being the first sign that tomorrow’s gonna suck.”
Jimmy Fallon
Blood Puns
I hate going to the doctor because all he does is suck blood from my neck.
Do NOT go see Dr. Acula!
Utensils Puns
I really hate straws.
They suck.
Funny Birthday Poems
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Birthdays suck,
If they're not for you.

Happy birthday!

(Kevin Nishmas)
Mosquito Puns
A mosquito asks for a date: "I'd like to take you out to suck blood on someones leg"
She says "I don't know, I feel like I'm going out on a limb here."