What genre are national anthems?
Country.
My dad just told be a cool joke about drums
I thought I’d snare it with you guys
I used to play triangle in a reggae band but I had to give it up. It was just one ting after another.
The police came to arrest me after I tried to play my cat like a violin
They are charging me with Kitty Fiddling.
I've started a new band called "Blanket'
We're a cover band
Did you hear the Islamic music group who covered "I've Got You Babe?"
Sunni and Shia.
I always put my money in drums
Because it’s a sound investment.
Which music group really embodied the fake it until you make it mantra?
The Pretenders.
How did the turkey win the talent show? With his drum-sticks.
What kind of music should you listen to while fishing?
Something catchy.
What's better than having roses on your piano?
Tulips on your organ....
What do you call a pianist who throws trash everywhere?
Litterachi.
What did Prince leave on the neck of his guitar?
Finger prince.
What instrument do English people play?
The Anglo-Saxophone!
My uncle was crushed by a piano...
His funeral was very low key.
Why did the jazz musician refuse to be quarantined?
Cause he was an outdoor cat.
Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?” The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”
Which composer likes tea the most?
Chai-kovsky.
What do you call a cow that plays the saxophone? A blues moo-sician.
Ringo, John snd George walked into an electric guitar shop...
They were less Paul.
What did the violin say when it finally played the music correctly?
Viola.
What’s the difference between a musician and a 14-inch pizza?
A 14-inch pizza can feed a family of four.
Why can't guitars have fun with friends with benefits?
Because without strings attached they just can't play...
What do you call a boy and girl playing blues music? The battle of the saxes.
Whats the difference between and orchestra and a bull? On the bull the horns are in the front and the a***ole is in the back.
What do you call a gingerbread man with one leg bitten off?
Limp Bizkit.
Bad saxophone players should be put on some kind of public list.
I want to know if I'm living next to a registered sax offender.
The Cuban main violinist's string snapped during a performance. Luckily, he got offered another violin by his American friend.
That day, another Fiddle Catastrophe was prevented.
What do you call a singing laptop?
A Dell.
What concert costs 45 cents?
50 Cent featuring Nickelback.
Why did the pianist keep banging his head against the keys?
He was playing by ear.
What’s the difference between a violin and a fiddle?
One has strings and the other has strangs.
What is the difference between a saxophone and a lawnmower? Vibrato.
Egyptians claimed to have invented the guitar,
But they were such lyres.
Did you hear the one about the pianist convention?
They had a few keynote speakers
I had a job repairing 17th century violins...
I only fixed instruments that were BAROQUE.
Asked a pianist if he could play the Chick Pea Song.
He said, "Maybe. Can you hummus a few bars?"
I'm starting a music group that performs Classical Greek music.
I'm calling it Oedipal Arrangements.
Drums - You can't beat 'em. Well, you have to, really.
Why did the music teacher need a ladder? To reach the high notes.
What do you call a cow that can play a musical instrument?
A moo-sician.
When I play my violin it always sounds like it's crying
It's must be too highly strung
What is the difference between a drummer and a vacuum cleaner?
You have to plug one of them in before it sucks.
What was stolen from the music store? The lute.
All my neighbours bought the same set of stereos...
When will they stop stereotyping?
Silent Violin for Sale
No strings attached.
What is Beethoven doing now?
De-composing.
I wrote a song about a tortilla. Well actually, it’s more of a wrap.
How do you fix a broken tuba?
With a tuba glue.
I asked my musician friend if he plays by ear.
He said, "Yes, it's a violin. That is how you hold it."