I've been diagnosed with a type of amnesia that makes me deny the existence of certain 80's bands.
There is no cure.
What is the difference between a fish and a piano?
You can’t tuna fish.
What do you call a pianist who throws trash everywhere?
Litterachi.
What instrument do English people play?
The Anglo-Saxophone!
How do you make a bandstand?
Take away their chairs.
My orchestra buddy wanted to bring his fiddle to a protest. I told him not to.
In a peaceful protest, there's no need for violins.
Violinist Caught following a String of Robberies.
Someone once asked if I ever played the violin
I told him that I had fiddled with it.
I re-skinned my drums with the skin my faithful steed Chestnut. I want people to reflect on the emotional connection between man and beast through the art of drum solos.
But my wife says I'm just beating a dead horse.
What do you get if you drop a piano on an army base?
A flat major.
What is the musical part of a snake?
The scales.
How do you keep your violin from being stolen?
Put it in a viola case.
What does a trumpet and a baseball have in common? People cheer when you hit them with a bat.