What do you call a broke santa? Give up yet? It's Saint-NICKEL-LESS.
What do monkeys sing at Christmas? Jungle bells, jungle bells…
Thank brew very much.
You’re my lucky charm.
The pint’s the limit.
You're acute Valentine.
You’re my pot of gold.
"Eggs love you."
Hold on for deer life.
What do you call a kid who doesn’t believe in Santa?
A rebel without a Claus!
“Santa’s beard is so long because he’s bad at shaving. Why do you think they call him Saint Nick?”
What did Santa name his dog? Santa Paws!
Your name must be Summer because you are hot.
What’s the opposite of Easter?
Wester
"I have so many egg puns, it's not even bunny."
Every piece of you is sweet.
How do sheep greet each other during the holidays? Fleece Navidad!
Was a bit lonely by myself at home last night on Valentine's Day so I decided to make my own bread.
I was feeling quite kneady
Snow on and snow forth.
It takes one to snow one.
“Oh, deer! Christmas is here!”
How does Santa capture photos? With his North Pole-oroid.
You must be glue because I am sticking with you.
Are you a 30 degree angle? Because you're acute-y.
What is the Easter Bunny's favorite drinking game?
Hop Scotch.
Snow thank you.
What did the arsonist do on Valentine's day?
He met his match.
I'm pine-ing for you.
It’s the most wonderful time of the beer.
Believe in your elf.
Happy Valentine's day.
Such a Lovely day.
"Just one hot chick."
"Now he's just some bunny that I used to know."
You snooze. You booze.
Why did St. Patrick drive the snakes out of Ireland?
It was too expensive to fly and too long to walk.
When I tell you how much I love you, I'm not overreacting.
You're so clover!
I just want to say, “I love brew.”
Son: does Easter Bunny set out 12 eggs in the field to search for?
Dad: no he dozen’t.
As it snow happens.
Why did the Easter Bunny go to the doctor?
It was time for his annual eggzam.
"Every bunny was kung fu fighting."
"I'm eggs-hausted."
"Beat it." — Michael Jackson, "Beat It"
Don’t worry, beer happy.
How can you tell where the Easter Bunny left his treasure
Eggs marks the spot.
I asked the older woman at work what she is doing for Valentine’s Day and she said that she was taking her husband to the Cardiologist. The heart wants what the heart wants.
Who’s your paddy?
I think you’re dandelion.
Why does Valentine's Day never work in Africa?
All the lion cheetahs.